Category: Misc.

Where My Girls At: A Queer Girl's Guide to San Francisco Socializing

By Majnoonita
updated 5 months ago

San Francisco plays host to one of the most vibrant queer communities in the United States, serving as a magnet for queers of every stripe. With so many sub-cultures within the queer scene, it can sometimes be overwhelming to go in search of a comfortable hang-out. Where queer men sometimes have more obvious choices in their social destinations (um, the Castro), queer women often arrive in SF wondering where to wander to. No matter what you're into, San Francisco has a place for you.

Lexington Club

3464 19th St, San Francisco, CA 94110

The Lex is San Francisco’s only official dyke bar. That’s right, all ladies, all the time (however the Lex does well to bend its own gender rules, transmen are very welcomed at this bar). Sorry bio-boys, but you’ll have to be accompanied by a lady-friend if you want to enter this sapphic establishment. Notorious for maintaining such a strong dyke and trans community, $1 margaritas during happy hour, and religious Sunday night showings of The L Word, the Lex is a great way for a new girl on the block to warm up to the SF scene.

Wild Side West the

424 Cortland Ave, San Francisco, CA 94110

Of a more folky, hippied out persuasion? Wild Side West is the place for you. A cozy saloon-esque bar with a magical multi level patio and garden, this is the spot for those who want a chill night with friends. Whether listening to impromptu jam sessions on the lower patio, playing pool by the jukebox indoors, or snuggling close to a new friend in one of the many secret seating nooks in the enchanted garden, Wild Side is the perfect spot for an evening of conversation and music.

El Rio

3158 Mission St, San Francisco, CA 94110

“El Rio…Your Dive!” is the slogan out front of this non-descript-on-the-outside bar on Mission Street (at Caesar Chavez). The reason I love this bar, aside from it playing host to Mango (see What Where When below) is because of its remarkably chill vibe and truly neighborhoody feel. Although certainly catering to the dyke-crowd for many events (Mango, ToGETher: Lesbian Dating Party), El Rio has live music almost every night and is a venue for the annual Madcat Film Festival, which draws a variety of people from all over the city.

Cat Club

1190 Folsom St, San Francisco, CA 94103

Cat Club is a two-sectioned club in the city’s South of Market district, with two separate dance floors that play drastically different music selections at the same time. Getting bored with 80s new wave and pop? Head over to the hip hop room, jump on stage and be an impromptu Go-Go dancer.

Dolores Park

18TH ST & DOLORES ST SAN FRANCISCO, CA 94110

Dolores Park is the premiere, all encompassing queer destination of San Francisco, so much so that it has garnered the nickname ‘Gay Beach.’ the park not only offers one of the best views of the city skyline, but it’s the perfect spot for picnics, sunbathing and most importantly: people watching. Nestled on a sloped rectangular plot of land between Dolores and Church streets and 18th and 20th Streets, this park has it all: hills, flats, a playground, palm trees, tennis and basketball courts, public restrooms, and a small army of ice cream vendors. Sunny weekends are guaranteed to be somewhat crowded, so pack a lunch, some sunscreen, and head over early for prime location scouting. Don’t forget a blanket to sit on!

Femina Potens Gallery

2199 MARKET ST SAN FRANCISCO, CA 94114

Not into the bar or club scene? Femina Potens is a great alternative. Devoted to advancing women and transpeople in the art world, Femina Potens creates space and visibility for those who normally are marginalized in the art scene. Not just an art gallery and performance space, Femina Potens puts on other events such as film screenings, artist’s lectures and salons, and queer speed dating.

Dance, Dance Revolution

After you’ve gotten your feet wet at Dolores Park and The Lex, you will undoubtedly be overcome with an intense urge to smash yourself up against a throbbing mass of hot and sweaty strangers. That’s right, you’re ready for the club circuit. Dance parties in this city (like any city) range from righteous and stale to hysterical and invigorating. Like much of the socializing in San Francisco, a lot depends on the weather. During warmer months and sunny days the club scene tends to be more spontaneous and fuel injected. During the rainy season they can sometimes be lackluster. But one thing’s for sure, during Pride month the dance parties in this town are absolutely bananas.

There are five major ongoing, lady-friendly, queer dance parties in the city. They are: Cockblock and Rebel Girl both at The Rickshaw Stop, Hot Pants at Cat Club, Mango (which is seasonal) at El Rio, and Stay Gold at the Make-Out Room.

Rickshaw Stop

155 Fell St, San Francisco, CA 94102

A multi-level club on the edge of Hayes Valley, The Rickshaw Stop hosts two of the city’s hottest queer dance parties: Cockblock and Rebel Girl. My favorite part of the Rickshaw Stop, other than the weird noir vintage footage they project onto the far wall of the dance floor, is the 2nd floor balcony where you can watch the entire club jostle and twitch in queertastic dance affect.

Make-Out Room

3225 22nd St, San Francisco, CA 94110

A loungey music venue in the heart of the Mission bar strip, the Make-Out Room hosts a hump-day queer dance party on the last Wednesday of each month. Low cover and central location makes this an excellent choice to satisfy your mid-week queeriosity.