Your Picks For The Three Stooges Remake

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I may be a youngster, but The Three Stooges films have always been dear to my heart. When the babysitter fell asleep I used to sneak into our video drawer and pop in one of my dad's Stooges tapes, even though my mom forbade it due to the extreme violence. Man, I was such a rebel. In any case, while I have a pretty good feeling about the Sean Penn, Jim Carey Benicio Del Toro lineup, here are a few other suggestions that I feel might have worked better, based upon my intimate knowledge of the beloved trio. What are your picks?

THREE STOOGES: The First Generation

HOW ABOUT A FEMINIST VERSION

Because as long as the hairstyles are right, women won’t know the difference.

 

...PLAYED BY JACKIE CHAN

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They have that similar intensity…

...PLAYED BY JEFF GOLDBLUM

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Because Jeff could totally nail the jitters.

...PLAYED BY VIN DIESEL

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Didn’t he play a nanny in some romantic comedy that one time?

...PLAYED BY SHILOH JOLIE-PITT

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...PLAYED BY VIOLET AFFLECK

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Sorry Ben and whoever your wife’s name is. If you’re gonna put Violet in Hollywood, she might get typecast as the reject.

...PLAYED BY SURI CRUISE

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...PLAYED BY CATE BLANCHETT

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I mean, she’s done it before…

...PLAYED BY RIHANNA

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...PLAYED BY THE HILARIOUS PARIS HILTON

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Pretty much everything that comes out of her mouth is comic genius.

Larry Played By Jeff Daniels

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I honestly after watching Dumb and Dumber thought while Jim Carey had the slapstick draw, it was Jeff Daniels that really made the movie. He has that same psuedo-straight-man-I’m-trying-to-be-the-voice-reason-but-I’m-too-much-of-an-idiot quality that Larry always had. Perhaps the moment for him has passed, but, honestly, check out that goofy smile!

added by egodeth 05/07/2009
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Discussions

by roger  04/24/2009  Reply

I cant help but laugh and be offended by most of these. Smells like a winner…a very foul smelling winner!

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by ghosty  04/23/2009  Show 1 Reply

Great guide as usual! Wait, how is Rhianna a good pick for a feminist Stooges? She farts around with a beater…

About The Author

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elissa Rss 

San Francisco
I like to overdress, I don't understand musical theater, and I'm always the one who changes the message in a game of Telephone.

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