Office Pranks

When you prank a friend, you prank yourself in a way. Remind them of this when they’re standing over you with a crowbar, prepared to bury it in your head. A good prank deserves another, and if your friend has any brains they’ll just respond in kind, hopefully pushing the envelope just a bit more with each return.

When pranking someone, it’s important that you know how they’ll react. While it’s funny for me to joke about someone burying a crowbar (or other heavy blunt object) into your head, in real life it would hurt. If someone is the office clown, they’ll probably either react in one of two ways – they’ll laugh and get you back at some point, or their precious small amount of self esteem will crumble and they’ll burn your house down. So start small and slowly increase the pranks. Remember to match prank to prank.

Level 1 Pranks

Nothing major, just some small things you can do to annoy your coworker.

1. The mouse joke. This one’s been around since computers. All you need to do is either take out the ball on the bottom of the mouse or put a piece of tape over the laser. Depends on what kind they have. Either way, it’s fun.
2. The keyboard joke. All you need for this one is a screwdriver or some fingernails to get underneath some keys. I prefer the dash & the plus key. These are rarely used and when you switch them the victim rarely realizes. I did this once to a guy and he remapped his keyboard cause he couldn’t figure it out.
3. The mail slot joke. Purchase some (i.e. as many as you can fit) ping pong balls and fill it up. If it’s an open-ended mail slot like many places have, tape a piece of paper over the front.
4. The coin trick. First, make sure it’s ok to ruin the floor by the victim. Then get a dollar coin and superglue it to the ground by the victim.
5. The cup. Fill a cup with water about half way. Then place an index card over the cup. Then turn the cup upside down on your co-worker’s desk. Finally, carefully slide the index card out from underneath the cup. Whenever your co-worker decides to pick the cup up, he will be drenched in water.
6. Phone trick. Tape down the receiver button. This way when they lift up the receiver the phone keeps ringing.
7. Pen trick. Remove all the ink from victim’s pens. Try to do this before a big meeting where they can’t leave and talking will get them in trouble.
   

Level 2 Pranks

A little more involved, these get a bit risky and even risqué. You could get fired for these, so be careful.

1. Small animal trick. Buy a gerbil and put it in the victim’s drawer. You’re responsible for the animal though, so think this through.
2. Internet trick. Buy your victim’s name on a DNS site. For example, buy JohnEvans.com and then post embarrassing things about him.
3. New opening trick. Post a job opening for your victim. Post it on Craigslist, HotJobs and anywhere you possibly can. Put your victim’s number, email, etc. as the contact. This way they get applications for their own position.
4. Sink trick. Put a rubber band around the sprayer of the sink, that way when they turn the water on it sprays them.
5. Love letter. Print out a risqué letter, mentioning your victim by their first name. Leave it by the printer as if someone forgot to take it with them.

Level 3 Pranks

Childish and enough to get you fired for sure. Don’t do
these pranks.

1. Gross. Poo in the victim’s private sink. ‘nuff said.
2. Locked out. Seal someone’s car lock with super glue. This doesn’t work as well as it used to given the more electronic nature of vehicles today.
3. Fishy. Hide a dead fish somewhere by the victim. Make sure it’s somewhere they won’t find right away. I recommend behind a drawer or taped to the bottom of a drawer. Alternately, use a can of tuna with holes punched in the top.