Nothing Says I Love You Like A Macaroni Picture Frame - Lame Mothers' Day Gifts Explored

The Giant St. Bernard You Don't Feel Like Taking Care Of Anymore

It was so much cuter and cheaper when it was a puppy and its drool didn’t look like a shoestring hanging from its mouth.

Curves Fitness Hula Hoop

Don’t trust the marketing photos of mothers joyously using these things.

The 2009 Ferret Calendar

I know, I know they’re on sale this time of year…And who could fathom that anyone might be disappointed by a ferret calendar? But trust me…this didn’t go over so well for me last year.

Suggested Books From The Mother's Day Table At Borders

One woman’s suggested reading list is another woman’s insult.

Button Featuring Soon-To-Be Deer Carcace

Morbid and absurd.

Rabbit Paperweight

Rigatone Necklace

Let’s be honest: You barely got away with this one in 4th grade.

A Racist Coupon Booklet

Water Aerobics Lessons

Even worse than the Curves hula hoop.

Original Artwork

A New Mop

I noticed the floors in my parents’ house were looking a little dirty, so I figured my mom needed a new mop. She didn’t seem too thrilled. Bad idea? Oops.

Babies Dressed like RATS- ANNE GEDDES ANYTHING

Seriously, the calendars were enough, then there were mugs, framed pictures, figurines, coasters. UGH.

The Nebulous Decorative Box

Too small to store anything of use, and one more thing on the shelf to dust, nothing says “I couldn’t think of anything better” quite like a nebulous decorative box.