I think it’s brilliant how Whole Foods marks up all of their products – organic or no – to stratospheric prices and still have tons of people wanting to shop at their store. It’s like Steve Jobs and his Reality Distortion Field, they can pretty much say or do whatever they want and people will go along for the ride. Brilliant!

Because my parents were busy working 18 hours a day during my childhood, I was usually left to my own devices. Much of my childhood entertainment involved running over to Hannam Chain Market and pestering the cashiers and bag boys. I still shop here whenever I’m wanting to wax nostalgic or in the mood to fry up some pork belly lettuce wraps at home.

My girlfriend is very proud of her Chinese heritage, but every trip to the 99 Ranch Market brings out a vicious diatribe against her people. I always tell her not to take it personally, as it’s a cultural thing: there are over a billion people in the Middle Kingdom, you don’t have time to be polite there. I guess she’s pretty Americanized because she just stews in her internal anger, but me, I get into it and start pushing people by their faces just like everybody else. pushing a grandma’s face “BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!”

Excellent selection of Japanese candy, chips and beer. At Japanese prices too. Sheesh, come here with money; lots and lots of it.

I remember a few years back Ralphs employees were striking for more pay and benefits. Being a broke college student (as opposed to my current status as an equally impoverished postgraduate) I tried to apply and was thoroughly rebuked by many former employees for scabbing across the picket line. Whatever, man. Free market economy decides this shit!

The Pasadena store is the original flagship location of this famous chain. Trader Joe’s takes food historically reserved for the higher socioeconomic demographic (i.e. caviar, pate, organic – free range – pesticide free – macaca nuts) and makes it available to everyday people like you and me. You’d never think that they’re owned by an infamously secretive German multi-billionaire, but… here we are.

The premiere cheese specialty market in Southern California, they have everything to satisfy the wine swilling, cheese gorging bourgeois in all of us. Ever try Azeitao or Tilsit before? Delicious!

Famed for their amazing Godmother Italian sandwiches, Bay Cities also boasts a fine selection of fresh cut Italian meats, breads and condiments. Be careful of the crowd though… it’s definitely as packed as 99 Ranch, but I think the face pushing with this audience ain’t going to go over so well.