The Worst Teams of All Time

The 2004 New York Yankees

Dominate the AL East all they wanted, the Yankees were still going on four seasons without a World Series win. They came into the 2004 ALCS and laid the pain on the Boston Red Sox. The series was theirs for the taking by Game 4, but then Boston won and would go on to destroy the Yanks in three dominating games of their own. Add insult to injury? Not only does Boston go on to the World Series, but they then end “The Curse of The Babe” with their first World Series win in 84 years. To this day, The 2004 New York Yankees committed the Greatest Choke In All of Sports History.

The 1908 Democratic Campaign of William Jennings Bryan

Though a gifted speaker, Bryan failed not once – but TWICE – to score The White House for the Democrats. His first campaign was based on anti-imperialism as modern world powers were emerging and he was an outspoken critic against Darwinism. William McKinley defeated him handily in 1900, but somehow, he found a way back onto the ticket in 1908, running on almost exactly the SAME platforms. Clearly, the guy never heard of “Quit while you’re ahead.”

The Colorado Rockies

They suck. Any and all years.

They suck.

1962 New York Mets

Managed by the legendary Casey Stengel, in their inaugural year the Mets won 25% of their games, finishing 60.5 games out of first place. They were the last stop for several future big league managers, including Roger Craig, Don Zimmer and Gil Hodges.

1976 Tampa Bay Buccaneers

This team was absolutely terrible and even the recent success of the Bucs can’t erase this season from fans memories. 0-14? They would likely have gone 0-16 if the schedule had been longer in 76. The team was shut-out 5 times that season and didn’t even average double digit points per game. They averaged fewer than 9!

Losing games by more than twenty points was the norm. Former Heisman Trophy winner and visor stomping head coach of the South Carolina Gamecocks, Steve Spurrier, was the quarterback for this miserable collection of B-league players.

The team ended up losing the first twelve games of the following season as well and supposedly their coach, John McKay, wouldn’t talk to his players after the third game during the week. He saved his comments for berating them along the sidelines only. This team, losing 26 straight games, is definitely the WORST ever.

The 2007 Miami Dolphins

The Dolphins franchise holds two distinct titles. in 1972, they became the only football team in NFL history to complete an undefeated season and captured the Super Bowl. In 2007, they became the 7th team in NFL history to finish the season 1-15. Hard to believe that a team with such a pedigree has struggled so vastly since the retirement of Dan Marino. Either way, in the season following, Bill Parcells was hired to the team’s front office where he effectively fired half of the team’s coaching and executive staff.

1972 Philadelphia 76ers

This one hits a bit close to the heart, but it’s an inconvenient truth: the 1972 Philadelphia 76ers went 9-73. Ten years later though, the Sixers would go onto to clinch an NBA Championship, things were bleak in the early ’70s. Rocky was still a few years off from being made and – knowing my hometown – nobody was rooting for an underdog back then. Anybody from that team should feel lucky they left the Spectrum in one piece.

The 1998 Production Team Behind The U.S. Version of Godzilla

If you actually saw this flick, I need not say anything more. Apparently, the U.S. Godzilla appears in the 2004 Japanese film, Godzilla: Final War, and fights the Japanese Godzilla. The creature was renamed Zilla because, as the filmmakers claim, the U.S. version took the “‘God’ out of Zilla.” I apologize on behalf of my country for that one.

Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld and Rice

You couldn’t mess things up as bad as they did if you tried. The FAIL FOUR.

The Detroit Lions

The Detroit Lions, as a team, franchise, and business. 1957 they won the NFL Championship and have won only 1 playoff game since. This team is a death trap for any player who has aspirations of winning an NFL championship. This team is so bad that due to the blackout policy, their own fans can’t watch any of the games while the Lions are being creamed and treated like a high school team.

Not to mention that during the 90’s, the Lions had one of the greatest running backs to ever play the game in Barry Sanders. Unfortunately the Lions front office thought he could do it all himself and refused to build a championship caliber team around him. In 1998, Sanders sent a fax to the team owners announcing his early retirement, because not playing football is better than playing for the Lions.

A big step was made with finally firing Matt Millen (after 8 miserable years) but the damage has been done.

In the 2008-09 season the Detroit Lions became the first team since the ’76 Bucs to go winless, and the first team in NFL history to go 0-16.