If you could be any video game character...

SonicThe Hedgehog

Who wouldn’t want to be Sonic? He’s fast, blue, fast and has a friend with two tails! Oh yeah, great background music, too.

Galen Marek, a.k.a. "Starkiller"

From Star Wars: The Force Unleashed, this is one of the first guys we get to see use the force like it was meant to be. Ah, the glorious evil!

Kirby

Soley because he’s cute and I’m superficial like that. Okay, actually I have a weird position on video games. In theory, I love them. In reality, I get addicted to them. As a kid, we only had basic Nintendo and a handful of games, but sometimes I would play obsessively, for half the day, and then I would dream in video games and wake up being scared about my Sim cities or Dr. Mario capsules etc. etc.

So, I decided way back when to cut myself off COMPLETELY from video games. And thus, I don’t really know any video games or characters from the last 10-15 years. For my health’s sake.

Link

Link gets to explore a perilous (but graphically breathtaking) land on a sweeping search-and-rescue mission. He also gets to play cool, otherworldly musical instruments and ride a horse. ’Nuff said.

MegaMan

Because the music in that game IS AWESOME. And if I were a vidoe game hero, I wouldn’t want some weak-ass tunes to bring me down, you know?

…because I’m hungry like that.

A Winrar is you.

Any character from Pro Wrestling.

This guide is full of win.

Princess Peach

In her DS game, one of her weapons is TEARS, just like a real woman! And the girl knows how to accessorize.

Mortal Kombat

I’d only want to be in this video game if I could be Scorpion so I could shoot a spear out of my hand and say “Get over here!”

Solid Snake from the Metal Gear series. Stealthy as a ninja and has awesome weapons at his disposal. He brings out the nerd in me.

Lara Croft

Girl with Guns kick ass…need I say more?

Donkey Kong

Hello! He is strong, wears a tie, and is HUGE! Plus, it’s the only video game I ever played besides super Mario and I don’t want to be Mario. That mustache would annoy me. Donkey Kong looks like he has more fun anyway. Especially on the train tracks and under water!!!

Samus

I don’t care if she’s a lady, that suit is awesome!

Mario from Mario64

The dude was a nasty gymnast, had crazy diving skills, and could turn into metal, fly and go invisible. Game over bowser.

Commander Keen

Honestly, pogo sticks? Ray guns? A cool spaceship? Nothing more threatening that slow-moving slugs?

Hell yes.

Richter Belmont

Every girl crazy ’bout a sharp dressed man, esp one who kills vampires.