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What would you steal on your last day?
- by freeandflawed
- 6 contributors
- -
- February 28, 2009
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(6)
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Having just quit one of my three jobs, I had the fun experience of cleaning out my office. This got me thinking about all of those fun "I can't wait to quit" or "when I quit..." stories. I didn't pull a Jerry McGuire and I didn't steal the toilet paper. But if I did, here's what I would have taken...
Post-Its
A whole crap load of Post-Its. Enough to cover a room. And not just a pack of yellows. Oh no, I’m going all out and pulling the blues, greens, pinks and oranges, too. I’d like to have enough to last me an entire year.
All the good pens
My goal would be to escape with enough of my favorite pens so that I never have to buy one again. That’ll show ’em!
added by mswen 02/16/2009
I'd steal the world
In the conference room, hanging on the wall there is a world map. But not just any world map. There is a light that simulates the sunlight, and it moves, showing the path of daylight anywhere in the world. You can see where the sun is just rising, or setting. Where in the world there are shorter days depending on the time of year. It fascinates me. Unfortunately, way too big & heavy to smuggle out in my purse.
added by Lou 02/15/2009
Something of your Boss'
Because your boss was probably not your favorite person, but perhaps he/she has a World’s Best Boss mug like Michael Scott and rather than call him out on the BS factor of such a mug, just purloin that puppy and run. RUN.
added by aliciak 02/28/2009
On second thought...
I should have taken some toilet paper! That stuff is expensive. Especially the good stuff. It just so happens that we’re on the last roll in Casa de Jenn.
We have some of the comfiest chairs my toosh has ever sat on. If I could have some how wheeled that out while remaining inconspicuous, I would have taken two!
The office hottie
It’s going to break your heart not seeing them everyday, so why not take them with you? All you have to do is ask for help loading all your stuff into the car, and then when they’re close enough, shove them in the car, cover them with a blanket and drive away. Simple!
added by AugustRush 02/13/2009
For me, it’s not “what would I steal,” but rather “what have I stolen.” I’ve quit a couple jobs in my day and I’ve taken the following: colored Sharpies, Post-Its, mechanical pencils, packets of Advil, folders, and blank CDs.
added by Elijay 02/16/2009
This sucker...
There’s been jobs with these full of different sweet treats and I’ve gone through periods where I would eat ONLY HOT TAMALES AND GUM BALLS. They’re delicious and it’s a distraction from getting work done, but really- I just think it’d look cool in my house.
added by The Mean Bean 02/17/2009
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I feel like such a nerd because the majority of things I’ve stolen from jobs (education mostly) were books. Some more hardcore academic than others. Books are expensive and I like them!
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