Pretty People Say STUPID Things: Cause God Doesn't Give You Looks AND Brains
Every year around that time when all the beauty queens come out wearing their perfectly bleached teeth and hair, their tacky evening gowns and cheesy smiles, I sit in front of the TV and cringe every time they open their mouths. Beauty and brains are about as rare as the Chupacabra. And pretty person after pretty person opens their mouth and out falls something dumb. From beauty queens to pop stars.....let the hilarity ensue.
Ivanka Trump Says......
“Fiction writing is great. You can make up almost anything.”
Linda Evangelista Says....
“It was God who made me so beautiful. If I weren’t, then I’d be a school teacher.”
AND
“I don’t diet. I just don’t eat as much as I’d like to.”
Miss Alabama 1994 Amie Beth Dickinson Says.....
“I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever.”
Brooke Shields Says....
“Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost a very important part of your life.”
Paris Hilton Says.....
“I’m so smart now. Everyone’s always like ‘take your top off’. Sorry, NO! They always want to get that money shot. I’m not stupid.”
Elizabeth Taylor (in her day) Says....
“When the sun comes up, I have morals again”
Miss California Carrie Prejean Says.....
“I think it’s great Americans are able to choose one or the other. We live in a land that you can choose same-sex marriage or opposite marriage. And you know what, in my country, in my family I think that I believe that a marriage should be between a man and a woman. No offense to anybody there, but that’s how I was raised and that’s how I think it should be – between a man and a woman.”
Mariah Carey Says....
“Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can’t help but cry. I mean I’d love to be skinny like that but not with all those flies and death and stuff.”
Britney Spears Says.....
The list goes on…..
“I get to go to lots of overseas places, like Canada.”
“I always call my cousin because we’re so close. We’re almost like sisters, and we’re also close because our moms are sisters.”
“I like most of the places I’ve been to, but I’ve never really wanted to go to Japan, simply because I don’t really like eating fish, and I know that’s very popular out there in Africa, but the whole thing just doesn’t appeal to me.”
Christina Aguilera Says....
“So, where’s the Cannes Film Festival being held this year?”
Miss USA Rachel Smith Says....
“Damned Mexicans hexed me!”……and continues with, “Just because 99% of Mexicans hate George W Bush I am made a scapegoat with some sort of ritual hex that they put on me, to fall on my ass.”
Smith told the press later after being asked how it feels to be responsible for over $100 million losses that American gamblers sustained after backing her to win the pageant at odds of 3/1 2nd fav.
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The pod of Mother Earth
You know you're going to give your kid a complex if you call them "The Mean Bean" instead of; sweetiepie, sugar face, bear, etc. My nickname stuck- even when I got nicer. AND my affinity for all things BEAN happens to be tremendous; Coffee beans (my coffee feign), Cocoa beans, Vanilla beans, chic...
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