Inauguration Day: Super Value Meal Options for Obama, Biden, and Fam

The #1: Corn Chowder Mash

A large bowl of creamy corn soup. The corn is grown in the great state of Illinois, along side several cow pastures. This is a great option for vegetarians! Bacon can also be thrown into the mix for those who enjoy the taste of pig.

• Comes with a choice of creamed or baked potato  
• Choice of side
• Choice of super sized 24 oz. sweet tea   
• Additional sides may cost US citizens $.50 extra in taxes.

The #2: Jerky, Biscuits, and Brown Gravy

Homemade buttery biscuits with a nice juicy layer of beef jerky slapped in the middle. Gravy is optional, but must be noted that it is a gray color. This is because there are loads of fat that have deposited inside of the gravy mixture. Do not worry, the gravy is a nice addition over the already salty jerky slabs. 

• Comes with a tahini side salad with croutons and sliced carrots.
• Choice of side
• A super sized water is recommended to wash down the salty after taste 
• May want to order something else in addition.  

The #3: BBQ Ribs with Collard Greens

Made from premium organic pork , these ribs will have your stomach feeling satisfied. The pigs were raised in Delaware and were found having intelligent conversations near their troughs.

One farmer overheard one pig say he was proud of his Senator’s success and hopes 2009 will be a better year. Sauteed collard greens are a nice addition to the BBQ ribs.

• Comes with corn bead
• Choice of side (mashed potatoes recommended)
• Included with a super sized 24 oz. diet coke

The #4: Grilled Sticky Salmon Buns

This is both savory and sweet. Sometimes it’s difficult to decide what you may want first, dinner or dessert. Why not have both at the same time? Similar to the McGrilddle, but with a more class, this meal includes: Lightly grilled salmon, atop homemade sticky buns covered in maple syrup and pecans.

• Comes with extra syrup and napkins
• Choice of side
• Choice of dessert afterward, in case that sweet tooth kicks in again.
• Side bucket is available in case regurgitation occurs.

The #5: Old Style Tofu Bits

Tofu can soak up just about any flavor. So in honor of this Chicago favorite, we created the Old Style Tofu Bits. This dish includes little bits of tofu smothered in a nice thin layer of Old Style.

Because Old Style is so light in flavor, it will not overpower the already blan tofu taste. The Old Style alcohol content is significantly low, so eat up! However, beware! The more you eat, the more alcohol you consume!

• Comes with an additional can of Old Style to wash the dish down with.
• Choice of additional side
• Old Style is recommended as a beverage.
• Also a great appetizer

The #6: The Dogfish Head, Eel Head Combo Meal

In honor of this Delaware favorite, we are offering the combination of two very different, yet delectable tastes to work together in this dish. This includes: The Dogfish Head 90 minute IPA poured atop juicy seasoned eel heads. This demonstrates world peace, while supporting the state of Delaware.

The tiny eye balls are still in tact, so gouging them out would be recommended.

• Choice of side
• Fries included
• Side house salad included
• Dogfish Head IPA recommended

Side Options

Additional sides may cost US citizens $.50 extra in taxes.

• Mashed Potatoes
• Corn Bread
• Collard Greens
• Side Salad
• Toothpick
• Fried Apples

• Old Style
• Dogfish Head
• Water
• Sweet Tea
• Diet Coke

Which Meals Do You Think Will Be Chosen?

Obama and crew seem hungry, so I am taking a poll!

Which meals do you think will be eaten?
(Place your comments on the comment page please.)

For example: Obama would like the #3, with an extra side of collard greens, followed by Hot ‘n Spicy Pork Rhines from the dollar menu. To wash it all down, he’ll drink an Old Style, and slip the Country Time in his back pocket to save for the golf course later.