Pimp My Goatee

by Excelninja  1 contributors  -  April 07, 2008   + Add To This Guide
News, Politics, & Pop Culture | Humor

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Even crab wontons need their goatees to be pimped. Now with a side order of happy Klingon and Ming the Merciless.

Please, Garthe Knight, Pimp my goatee!

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Even crab wontons need their goatees to be pimped.

First, you must grow a goatee people can be jealous of.

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Dude he can pull anything off.

Lest we forget Garthe Knight

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Arch enemy of Michael Knight! I would think this is pimping down in my case, but you gotta go with the classics sometimes.

How to Grow a Goatee

Step 1.  Eat some food.
Step 2.  Sleep.
Step 3.  Be completely lazy and do not shave for a couple of days or weeks, depending on your hair growing motivation.
Step 4.  Practice meditative breathing for fifty minutes of every hour and repeat the hair growing mantra “my hair must grow” in 3,000 repetitive cycles during that time.

Maybe we can pimp a Sparrow 'Tee

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Strangely, this is the only pimp I could find with beads or braids.

Sometimes you need to have a goal in mind when pimping a goatee

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Authentic Star Trek Mirror Universe Paper Goatee!

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[Instructions]

1. Cut along dotted line.
2. Keep the part that’s shaped like a goatee.
3. Attach it to your face. A space for eating, drinking, and breathing is provided.
4. If you already have a goatee, turn the goatee over, revealing a convincing bare-chin image. Proceed as above.
5. Fool your friends. Frighten Jim Kirk.

added by Dead C 10/29/2008

Goatee Saver

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An excellent device for ensuring that your goatee stays on track. Halloween is coming up and this little gadget also does a nice job of doubling as a prop for your Silence of the Lambs costume.

added by Dead C 10/29/2008
 

Don't forget, it is easy to enhance "crazy"

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Some pimping ideas are a little off base.

No doubt about it, ladies love the 'tee

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Anthrax's Scott Ian can have his own page full of goatees

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See what I mean? Some 'tees you just can't pimp any further.

Of course you can't go wrong with happy little Klingons!

Goatees don't have to be evil.

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Pimping ’tees has been around longer than you might think. And not just any kind of facial hair will do.

Pimp of choice for Star Trek Geeks like us

This is the pimp of choice for all nerds, geeks and origami enthusiasts. They might also find this full contact origami site interesting.

Master Splinter Masters Many Things.

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Discussions

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by aliciak  04/29/2009  Reply

Whoa! The goatee shaving tool?!? Whoa!

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by mandy  06/24/2008  Reply

Hoff is so pretty.

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by Hot Mama  04/22/2008  Reply

I just LOVE a man with facial hair! And David Hasellhoff is the best! I give you a thumbs up!

About The Author

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Excelninja Rss 

Aurora, CO
It is easy using my excel ninja organization (cult) to crank out the guidespot pages. I am not only a member, I am the founder. Don't drink the punch.

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