Categories: Dating & Relationships; Humor

Lamenting "Plastic Girls" and other Los Angeles Dating Cliches

By GillianS
updated 5 months ago

So, you find yourself a single woman in Los Angeles. It's pretty great. You're independent. Working, flirting, drinking, dating. Oh yes. DATING. It's fun for a while but can wear on you. One thing that I've noticed is that no matter who you go out with or where you go or what you do, there are certain comments and complaints that men have about dating in L.A. and if you give them half a chance, they'll make sure you know about them.

Plastic Girls

This is the first thing out of many guys’ mouths when prompted about dating in L.A. Invariably they hate the plastic girls with fake breasts, nose jobs, spray on tans and designer jeans. Of course, most guys really only hate them in theory because they know that they are not (a) hot enough or (b) rich enough to get a second look from one these high maintenance hotties. This is not the same as hating them outright. Take note, guys.

Mondrian Hotel

8440 W Sunset Blvd, West Hollywood, CA 90069

Skybar at the Mondrian is a perfect place to pick up any of these cliches. But you may have to save up to cover the tab.

Katsuya

11777 San Vicente Boulevard 120, Los Angeles, CA 90049

You’re as likely to find a wannabe Actress waiting tables at this ritzy sushi joint as you are to find a Plastic Girl prowling the bar.

Industry Types

The industry type bridges genders as many girls will complain about the prevalence of them, too. This is the social and corporate ladder climber who loves to talk box office, fast overnights and openers all while looking over your shoulder to see if there is someone else in the room that they really ought to introduce themselves to because he or she would really like this script they’re reading. After the initial round of being somewhat impressed and maybe a little awed by the glamour of it all, this type is Bo-Ring!

Superficiality

“Everyone in L.A. is so superficial.”

To me, this is a hilariously ironic statement to make on a date with someone in Los Angeles. Until you’re in love (what, 2 dates?) dating is all about the superficial and that mysterious and elusive chemistry. People in L.A. are superficial. People are superficial period. Just because someone doesn’t want to date you when you’re 400 pounds and unemployed doesn’t mean she’s too superficial. You can bet a girl in the same shoes wouldn’t be getting many dates, either.

Pigeonholing You While Complaining about "Them"

“I can tell you’re not from around here.”
He means: You didn’t reject me immediately even though I showed up for our date wearing Crocs. You are probably not worth my time.

“You seem really down to earth.”
He means: You are not a complete bitch. Which probably means that you are not worth my time.

“I had a really great time. Let’s do this again.”
He means: I will call you in 2 months after I get rejected by a few more Hollywood bitches who I complain about.