I Will Never Support These Stores!

Blockbuster

I don’t know if it’s really true that Blockbuster cuts out certain “improper” scenes from its collections, but I do know that they use a lot of their profits to fund certain organizations that I do not agree with. Plus, come on, kids! Support your local video stores.

Olive Garden

Please, Uncle Dennis! Stop buying me gift certificates to Olive Garden for Christmas. I just can’t do it anymore.

Red Lobster

I’d eat at Denny’s 100 times before eating at Red Lobster. Unless my grandpa wanted me to go, since it’s his favorite place. The first and only time I ever went there I definitely found a dead fly on my biscuit plate.

GlamShots

Hey, parents! Here’s an idea: Why don’t you book a “GlamShot” birthday party for your little girl, so you can totally show her that boys will only like her if she learns how to tease her hair.

Radio Shack

I outlined the exact reason in greater detail in this guide, but to sum it up, The Shack is overwhelmingly staffed with high school dropouts who feel like they’re the elitists of the electronics industry.

McCrappy Place

Okay, I’m sick of “Lovin’ it!” We know it makes us fat, the lattes are crap, and your commercials suck! Please, go away McDonald’s!

Starbucks

Get over yourself, Starbucks! You think because you have pink thermoses and CD compilations with Diana Krall on that I’m going to get sucked in? I don’t I’ve been in a Starbucks since I was sleep deprived in the middle of nowhere Indiana. This one’s too obvious.

Trattoria Caterina

Because they totally fired me back when I was 19. I swear this place is run by the Greek mafia. I probably have a hit out on me right now due to writing this.

Guitar Center

Walmart - This place makes me feel slimey

We successfully kept Walmart out of our old neighborhood. I hope these folks were successful as well.

I don’t get why people like to shop here, yuck.