Killing Time During Your Holiday Vacation

by matt_fried
-
January 04, 2009

Rate Guide

(1)

1 discussion

Good news: you've survived the major holidays of the season with your family. In no time, you'll be back home and making a bunch of regrettable decisions on New Year's Eve. Bad news: you're still stuck at home with another 24 hours to kill... with the family. Now naturally, this shouldn't be a bad thing... then again, I'm assuming you stocked up on tranquilizers and Ambien prior to coming "home for the holidays". If that's not the case, do not worry. There are plenty of things to do in whatever small suburban hole you once emerged from. For instance, I hear that the Madrigal choir is doing a free concert outside of the 7-11...

Reconnect with old high school friends

Grab a beer and play catch-up with somebody who you can barely hold a conversation with – oh boy! Nothing like seeing a person for the first time in a few years, but then having to listen that person go on and on about working for his dad… the fun doesn’t stop.

Add Comment

Hang Out at The Local Bar

Yeah! That’s right, guys! The bar! The one with those awesome buffalo wings and all those guys who love listening to that Journey song on the jukebox. No, not “Don’t Stop Believin’”, the OTHER Journey song. The one they said was a big hit when they were all in high school… in 1983. Those guys are awesome with all the random stuff they know about…

Add Comment

Get Religious

Take a spiritual quest; that’s what all the bored, self-involved people do. Crack open your Bible, or roll out your Torah, and get to know someone else’s interpretation of God. There’s always someone who likes to talk about this stuff with somebody. Just don’t end up at any soup kitchens – your bus home is at 2:00.

Add Comment

Just "Run Into" Your Ex

It’s been five years since you two last spoke. Since then, you’ve both moved on, carved out your own path, and have grown up. So, don’t you feel like rubbing it in her face? That’s when it comes time for some Facebook CSI and making a few phone calls so that you’ll just “happen” to be in the same place she is and you’ll have a Rolodex of talking points to discuss.

Add Comment

Get Life Advice From Your Parents

“Son… when are you going to get a job with health insurance.” That’s the sound of a father who’s fed up paying for your cell phone bill. It’s the dangerous topic that every midtwentysomething fears: “What are you doing with the rest of your life?” Okay, so the plan to open my own private investigation agency didn’t pan out. But here’s the thing: I’ve got plenty of time to figure it all out. Now, if you two excuse – my XBox is calling.

Add Comment

Hang Out at The Local Video Store

Thank God for this institution of all things pop cultural and time-killing. Nothing like being at a video store… complete with an apathetic staff who grows more and more angry with you, because you won’t asking them why they don’t stock The Complete Works of Orson Welles on DVD.

Add Comment

Guides We Think You'll Like

Discussions

: by mswen 01/04/2009 Reply

Oh my. That slice of pizza is hilarious.

All Discussions (1)

About The Author

matt_fried

Brooklyn

I'm a writer and comedian living in Brooklyn. You may've seen me around town at The Peoples Improv Theater, Upright Citizens Brigade Theater and Under St. Marks. I write funny stuff and maintain the blog, Sssh, don't tell anybody, but every single female Guidetripper and Maven is crushing on m...