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Why Isn't There IKEA Furniture Named After ME?
- by elisa
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- October 21, 2009
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The other day I was wondering around IKEA (yes, I am masochistic,) and I was noticing that a lot of the items have people names, and since I'm also egocentric I thought, "How come there's no ELISA furniture?" But I guess I can't really complain, surprisingly there's not a single piece of furniture named BJORN in the IKEA catalog.
ERIK
Drawer unit with 2 drawers on casters
$79.99
I’d be pretty pissed if my name was Erik, I mean come on, a filing cabinet?
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HAHA I LOVE the name Erik. Mainly because I know the most amazing person who goes by this name. This does not suit him AT ALL!
GUSTAV
Laptop table
$149.00
I’m sure the famous Gustavs of the world (Mahler, Klimt, Hurricane Gustav) would approve of this laptop table. If they knew what laptops were.
IKEA Furniture Naming: Where Do All of the Bizarre Names Come From?
The second-most asked question after, “Where do babies come from?”
INDIRA
Bedspread
$19.99
The only Indira I’ve ever known of is Indira Gandhi, and I’m pretty sure she deserves more than a bedspread.
ANDREA
Rug
$249.00
Andrea was once your best friend in elementary school, and now she’s just a rug you can’t afford.
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Did everyone have a friend named Andrea in elementary school?? Who are all the Andreas friends with now?
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Good question! We’ll have to track down some Andreas to find out!
PATRIK
Visitor chair
$149.00
Patrik looks way cooler than Patrick. No offense to you Patricks out there, but it just seems more Viking-like.
CYRIL
Computer cabinet
$199.00
You don’t meet too many people named Cyril nowadays, but it’s a pretty awesome name. Dibbs!
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I want a Cyril!
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Wait…What the hell’s a computer cabinet?
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Hahah— I’m sure Cyril would definitely be up to the challenge of holding napkins. Whether or not it would fit on your kitchen table is another story…
LENA
Fabric
$8.99/yards
Lena’s probably too pretty of a name for fabric samples, although I think the pomegranate print is rather attractive.
MIKAEL
Computer table with casters
$49.99
I sort of like this as an alternative spelling to Michael, it’s got spunk, or maybe just Sputnik.
Swedish Furniture Name Generator
This might just be the COOLEST thing ever. (I’m ELLISVA). Feel free to post yours!
IRIS
Oven mitt
$0.99
Poor Iris, a .99 oven mitt?! That’s worse than a filing cabinet.
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I too think of oven mitts as furniture. :)
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Hahah! I totally didn’t even think about that! I think I just got super excited that I found something named Iris :)
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Then again, I love that IKEA even names things so miniscule as oven mitts!
David Byrne On His First Trip to IKEA
“Why does everything have weird names? Every container, shelf, cabinet or appliance had some odd name, as if people from Planet Sweden anthropomorphized these objects, naming each one they encountered as best they could.”
BILLY
Bookcase
$89.99
I had a Billy bookcase when I was in college, and even then I thought it was weird that a piece of Swedish furniture would be named Billy.
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But the alliteration is quite wonderful—Billy Bookcase!
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I had Billy for a while. We were buds. He held all of my books and I dusted him. BFFs.
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It’s nice when things can end amicably.
ALEX
Drawer unit on casters
$119.00
Much like Alexander the Great, this drawer unit is both strong and regal.
HARRY
Chair
$49.99
I wouldn’t really peg this chair as a Harry, Given it’s simplistic lines I’d go for Rem or Mies.
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This totally does NOT look like a Harry. A Maude perhaps, or Katherine. Even Daniel.
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Somebody please tell me there is a Sally chair somewhere so I can make the set. Not kidding.
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Just checked and there is no “Sally.” Looks like Harry will be dancing alone come New Year’s Eve.
Guidespot Lurves IKEA
Boy, I Love Ikea by mswen
How Ikea is Like a Vasectomy bu GillianS
Clever, Modern Design by Coffee Slut
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I can just see it The Mean Bean ceramic vases….yep, brilliant.
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I just spent way too much time on IKEA’s website trying to find a piece of furniture with my name (or some variation). Not even an oven mitt!! SO not fair :(
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No Alicias either, BUT in googling for “Alicia furniture” just to be sure, I discovered that there is a town named Alicia in Arkansas and I am really excited about this! Field trip. Now.
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