How to have a successful wedding

by nuttycow
0 contributors
-
June 10, 2009
+ Add To This Guide

Rate Guide

(2)

3 discussions
|
15 comments
-
expand all

Wedding coming up? Worried about what your guests will think? Follow this guide and all will be ok.

1. Free bar

To me, this is a bit of a no-brainer. I understand that some people just don’t have the budget but for me, a wedding is a celebration and therefore should have free alcohol in order to help the er… celebration

View Comments (6)

2. Minimal use of children

I don’t mean in the slave labour kind of way – that should be done as much as possible (kidding, kidding, don’t report me to the NSPCC). What I mean is ok, people have children, I can’t begrudge them procreation. What I can get a bit miffed at is the fact they feel they have to bring them along to weddings. Weddings are adult things. They’re all about love and sex and marriage. They’re about getting drunk and flirting. They are not about small ankle biters tripping up unsuspecting guests and making drunken 27 year olds feel like they should have done more with their life.

View Comment (1)

3. Get a good band

I know music is subjective but when you’re planning your wedding, realise that not everyone shares your taste of music. Also realise that if people are drunk enough, they will dance (see point 1). Therefore, get a band that rocks. They should be a) good and b) play classics. Rehashing bad pop songs from the last 40 years does not count. Neither does playing slow songs at 8:30 in the evening. Who’s in the mood for a slow dance then?

Add Comment

4. Don’t force cheesiness on your guests

The first dance? Don’t do it. What could be more embarrassing for you or your guests than watch you and your beloved shuffle your way round an empty dancefloor to “My heart will go on” sung by an overweight backing singer. Not a lot. That’s what.

View Comments (2)

5. Make sure you have a good mix of people

I know that old people are obligatory at weddings. I know the ugly cousin who you’ve never spoken to probably needs to be there too. But the rest of the guests. These are yours. Have a good mix. Have single people, taken people, straight people, gay people, older people, young people. Make sure you have one “gets on with everyone” person on each table. Get your bridesmaids/ushers to do the work of introducing people that will get on. How pleased would you be if your wedding resulted in another? Well exactly.

Add Comment

6. Help out with logistics

If you’re going to have your wedding in the middle of nowhere (which I fully intend to) then make sure you help your guests out. Give them numbers of cab companies. List local B&Bs/hotels etc, give good directions. There’s nothing worse than people having to leave at 10:30 because they’ve got to get the last train home.

View Comments (3)

7. Feed your guests

I know that you’re likely to have a sit down meal with most of your guests but, if you’re budget’s a bit on the small side, you might invite a load of people just to the reception. If so, let them eat too. Why not offer cheese, biscuits, chutney, fruit and port at around 10:30 – that’ll help them soak up some of the booze and stave off those hunger pangs. And besides, everyone loves cheese!

View Comments (3)

8. Don’t let the speeches drag

It’s lovely that everyone wants to speak at your wedding but please don’t enforce it on everyone else. If great-uncle Alan from Atlanta wants to tell you how pretty you are, can’t he do it later. When no one else is listening? Eat. Listen to the father of the bride. Listen to the groom. Toast. Drink. Dance. Enough.

Add Comment

9. Don’t force compliments

Guest books. I hate them. Imagine, you’re slightly tipsy and the happy couple are asking you to think of something nice to say. All you can think of is “Why aren’t there any single men here you bastards? Don’t you care about us single people now you’re married?” and yet you end up writing “Congratulations! I know you’ll be very happy together! Just think, if you last 15 years and you’d have killed her instead of married her, you’d be free!”

Add Comment

Guides We Think You'll Like

Discussions

: by samantha63 10/25/2010 Reply

Find 2011 Fashion Wedding Dresses in http://www.weddingeast.com

: by susie 06/10/2009 Reply

Awesome advice! My sister’s wedding is in September so I’m trying to learn as much as I can and be the best maid of honor possible :)

: by freeandflawed 06/10/2009 Reply

I like the idea of this guide! I’ll have to remember these for when I get hitched! You should think about adding some fun pictures (try creative commons from Flickr) to go along with the text. It’ll make the guide pop more! :)