How to Enjoy Sex via a Long Distance Relationship

by pewpewpew
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January 04, 2009

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Just because you and your partner don't live in the same zip code, doesn't mean a committed, healthy, fulfilling sexual relationship is not possible. You can have a great long distance sex as long as both parties are willing to make it work. You need to be positive, trust one another, and if you need to spice things up, you'll neeed to learn how to use the webcam in a NSFW manner. Don't worry, this guide will teach you the ways!

Master the ability to send dirty text messages

This is a no brainer in any long distance relationship. Texting throughout the day is the easiest way to keep your loved one informed of your whereabouts, as well as whatever naughty thought is racing through your mind at that very moment. Surpise each other with as many dirty texts throughout the day as necessary! Now that there’s such thing as video and photo messaging via phone, this task is made all the easier.

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So what are you wearing?

Phone sex is so 1980s, but as long as people keep having LDRs, people will keep having phone sex. And why not? It’s really not so bad at all!

Since you can’t be physical during a long distance relationship, it’s important to use other senses at your disposal in order to keep your sex life healthy. And what better one to use than your ears? Okay, not in that way, you pervert. I mean, in the aural (sounds like oral) sense.

Good phone sex is all about description. Like a good book, you’re going to have to make it feel real, with language. This can easily be done with dirty talk. A lot of people are very shy about talking dirty, but it’s really not so daunting. Just peruse the hundreds of messageboards on the internet that help give you things to say, besides just the requisite “Oh yeah.”

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Ain't no shame stripping for the webcam

Seriously, ladies (and gents), you can’t be afraid to keep it interesting. Webcams were like totally invented with the express purpose of allowing you to have cybersex. Whoever says they weren’t is lying to your face.

In order to get over the fear of the webcam, you need to remember two words: lighting and angles. You actually don’t have to be as self-concious about being naked on webcam, because the image is so small and pixilated you’ll almost always be able to hide any perceived flaws with some strategic lighting or camera angle.

There are many tools you can use to have webcam sex: iChat and Google Video Chat are two of the more popular.

Finally, remember that you aren’t the first person nor the last person to have sex with someone via video. This stuff is so common, there’s nothing to be freaked out over. If you are having problems getting creative on the webcam, you can also go look at the classic one-person porno on the web to get ideas, or simply to ask one of your friends. I guarantee you they’ve all tried it at least once.

And your boyfriend/girlfriend will thank you.

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From the YouTube show "My LDR"

“Lotion, check. Towel, check. Alone? Sam’s carefully planned cyber sex session with Samantha is cut short when he finds her working on her paper in the library. Has Samantha simply forgotten about a date or has Sam’s love slipped her mind?”

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Cosmo magazine on how to have steam phone sex

“Before you dial, dim the lights, sip some wine or curl up with a dirty novel, says Anne Hooper, author of Great Sex Games. Once your libidinous juices are flowing, craft the perfect erotic icebreaker. If it’s your first time attempting lust on the line, a simple phrase such as “I wish you were lying here with me” will get his mind wandering."

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What to say during phone sex

“If you’re not ready to be graphic yet, relax. Detail trumps explicit language every time. After all, sex isn’t just about the parts down there. The key is to be as descriptive as you can. “I’m brushing my lips across the back of your neck…you can feel my warm breath right between your shoulder blades, as I start lightly kissing down your spine…” Think specifics.”

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Some advice from Go Ask Alice

* “Operator, I need some assistance.” * “What are you wearing… or not wearing?” * “Your voice makes me __________.” * "I love when you put your __________ on/in my __________. " * “The next time I see you, I’m going to __________.” * “Is that a cell phone in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?”

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