How to be a Domestic Goddess in New York

By aliciak
updated 22 days ago

I have made no secret on these pages and elsewhere that I strive to be a domestic goddess. While I love shooting the breeze with people, museum-hopping, attending book talks, playing beirut, and all the other fine things New York has to offer twenty-something peeps, there is a profound and complete happiness I get from the following: decorating my apartment with flower arrangements, cooking elaborate meals, baking pavlovas and paging through Martha Stewart, Real Simple and Saveur. Perhaps you too have been itching to try souffle making or burnt-sugar cupcake baking? I will try to get you there with the help of domestic goddess, Nigella Lawson. Now, come on, get ye into the kitchen.

Invoking the Spirit of Nigella Lawson

Once upon a time, my sister received Nigella Lawson’s How To Be A Domestic Goddess as a gift, but decided to give it to me because I would put better use to it. A glimpse into my future was seen as I grasped this baking bible, but let me just say right here, right now: my domestic goddess aspirations have NOTHING to do with being a subservient, submissive woman or BELONGING in the kitchen.

Maybe I shouldn’t go as far to say it’s about empowerment, but in a way, that’s what it is: knowing how to make and create things with your own two hands, being a resourceful, knowledgeable person who doesn’t rely on modern conveniences (restaurants, fast food, professional decorators).

The book says it best: its purpose is “not only about baking, but is also about enjoying being in the kitchen; about taking sensuous pleasure in the entire process and relishing the outcome.” Notice all those wonderful words! Enjoying, sensuous, pleasure, relishing!

Fasten Your Tool Belt, Ladies

Sometimes I pretend I’m a carpenter as I “fix” things around the apartment, using caulking for putty, a flat-head for a Phillips, and, well, usually ending up with a busted thumb and still-broken stuff. BUT, that’s because I don’t have the right tools, I tell myself! Well, to be a domestic goddess, we MUST have the right tools.

Two knives will not replace a pastry cutter, a spatula cannot act like a pancake flipper, a cake pan is NOT a souffle dish, nor is a pie dish a tart pan.

You still with me?

Broadway Panhandler

65 E 8th Street, New York, NY 10003

If you can’t spend a fortune on stocking your utensil canister or kitchen cabinets, Broadway Panhandler (which is NOT on Broadway, mind you) will sufficiently meet your needs. You’ll even find some bargains, albeit not as pretty as Crate & Barrel finds.

Williams-Sonoma

10 Columbus Circle, New York, NY 10019

I don’t shop here, I merely look. It’s a little too hoity-toity for me, even if I COULD afford it, but nonetheless try peeling me away from the KitchenAid mixer display. Just try! Ain’t happening.

Being a domestic goddess really must involve baking, so if you haven’t dropped some green on a mixer, you must. A hand mixer will not suffice. If you’re serious about this, make the investment! You can defer your loans for “economic hardship,” you know!

Sur LA Table

75 Spring Street, New York, NY 10012

I. love. Sur. La. Table. It’s the rainbow array of collanders that I used to pass on Crosby all the time, or maybe it’s the gigantic selection of cookie cutters. Or the free espresso from a $1200 machine. Okay, it’s all of these things.

I may have actually drooled here once or twice while trying to remember that, “You went to a college full of ball-busting feminists, Alicia.” Yeah, I know, but oh God I want those mini bread loaf pans. A little Gloria Steinem on one shoulder, a 50’s housewife on the other…

Fishs Eddy Inc

889 Broadway, New York, NY 10003

While I may consider myself a domestic goddess, or at the very least, close to it, I am also a klutz. This store is too compact for comfort—I am always afraid I’m 2 seconds away from knocking over a giant display of tumblers. Nonetheless Fishs Eddy has some fun New York series (Skyline, Central Park) that will fit perfectly in your kitchen and/or dining room.

The Quotable Nigella

All said in “How To Be A Domestic Goddess”

“I know this sounds like a mad idea.” – in reference to her Baklava Muffins

“Despite a move toward chic simplification, sometimes we need a touch of vulgarity in our lives.”

“I don’t understand why people don’t make brownies all the time—they’re so easy and so wonderful.”

“Don’t use those mean, hard little unyielding peaches, as unattractive as a bony bottom.”

“Bread, like a pasta, is best at conveying other flavors, not jumping about in a ra-ra skirt showing off its own.”

Set The Scene

I’ve tried to do the whole “make a house a home” thing in my New York City apartments, which translates to impractically buying flowers when I have no $$$, bidding on antique signs on Ebay and fervently desiring old seltzer bottles and giant candelabras.

It’s all part of setting the domestic goddess scene, finding the right accoutrements that will become permanent fixtures as you run around the kitchen, plan parties and create menus. You may feel like a giant Alice in your wonderland of a kitchen; where do these tiny refrigerators and stoves come from?!? So, not only do things need to look pretty and captivating, they also need to be organized, because chances are you’re low on space.

ABC Carpet & Home

888 Broadway New York, NY 10003

You will have to seriously break the bank to further your domestic goddess efforts here, but ABC is a jaw-droppingly and staggering 6 floors of furnishings and decorative things. If you’re like me, you’ll be impressed that it’s the largest carpet purveyor in the world (I guess they are not counting, say, Moroccan markets and such).

Chelsea Wholesale Flower Market

75 9th Avenue New York, NY 10001

Flowers may seem frivolous, but unless your home is filled with plants, you’ll need something freshly cut to add some live-ness and color to the place. It’s an “extra” well worth the expense, and experiencing the now-dwindling flower market is a must for New Yorkers and visitors alike.

Krup's Kitchen & Bath

11 West 18th Street, New York, NY 10011

Situated on one of my favorite blocks in all of Manhattan (18th between 5th and 6th avenues), the Krup’s window is BEAMING with retro refrigerators. A pink one! A blue one! They are positively glistening and I hope to some day put one in my home.

Crate & Barrel

611 Broadway A, New York, NY 10012

I bought the CUTEST $2 Italian wine opener here. Nevermind that it didn’t really work. I also possess adorable polka dotted shot glasses where the dots are in primary colors. As long as you don’t set foot on the 2nd Floor (furniture), the prices are reasonable. I mean, it’s not a bargain basement, but stemware and basic kitchen gadgets are really really affordable.

Blue Apron Fine Foods Ltd

814 Union St, Brooklyn, NY 11215

Perhaps you already can tell that I have a penchant for aprons, but Blue APRON is all about food. Gourmet cheeses, every type of ham/salami/sausage you can imagine and some hard -to-find baking ingredients like those little silver ball-balls (childhoodism) that even though are supposedly safe to eat, I never attempt to.

Also, it’s the only place in this part of Brooklyn that carries candied rose petals, which you will most definitely need if you decide to dive into a Martha or Nigella cookbook.

Dean & Deluca Inc

560 Broadway Frnt 2, New York, NY 10012

Nigella refers to this super duper fancy gourmet grocery store as a…wait…for…it…”super-deli.” Maybe deli is what heaven is called over there in the UK? Regardless, she can do no wrong (unless she refuses to take me under her baking wing when I ask).

Dean & Deluca can get a little crazy with too many people, but it’s a medium-sized shop with top-notch produce and lots of domestic goddess necessities. You almost FEEL like a goddess just walking around with a hand basket.

Vinegar Factory

420 E 91st St, New York, NY 10128

I used to walk by here every day while I was working at a daycare on the UES; I was always reminded how my $11/hour BEFORE taxes job would mean never shopping at Vinegar Factory. But it always smelled like bread as I meandered on by with a kid hand in each of mine. “Some day,” I would think.

Zabar's Deli & Gourmet Foods

2245 Broadway, New York, NY 10024

Experience the madness of Zabar’s on a weekend afternoon (or, like, any day) and you can finally call yourself a New Yorker.

How To KEEP Being A Domestic Goddess

Okay, just because this guide is finished does NOT mean you are by any means DONE. The practice and skills needed to be a domestic goddess must always be built upon. That 3-page long Martha Stewart recipe that takes 4 WOman hours? Just do it. The ice cream maker attachment for your KitchenAid? Buy it. But remember, like Nigella says, it’s about “enjoying being in the kitchen.”

So really, enjoy it!