Shoe porn

Chloe wedge

These Chloe wedges are from 2 seasons ago but I can’t stop sweating them. Even though Forever21 made an atrocious knock off, I am eternally in love with these geometric beauties. Unfortunately, my wallet says I can’t even afford one buckle on this shoe, but in my head I’m walking down the boardwalks of Miami with these bad boys on, a cheesy white 80s blazer with pair of huge shoulder pads, and some insane black sequin leggings.

Vivienne Westwood stacked stripper shoe

These shoes are not mean to be worn. They are meant to be bought and then proudly displayed in your closet for anyone who comes over to your house to look at, touch, and never try on.

Design My Own Fantasy!

My nasty scene goes a bit like this:

I am wearing a sexy stiletto and everybody is checking them out, strangers approach me, men grope me (oops, did I say that out loud), babies try to drool on them, dogs try to lick them, colleagues try to get me to leave them in my office drawer overnight, I can hear them go click click click down the dirty street… best of all, they are so sexy, so unique, so me, yet cover up my ugly feet at the same time, so I finally feel sexy about my feet….

Best of all, this personal fantasy becomes even more mine because I design my very own pair… yes, from greens to golds, reds to leather…. me me me, it is all about me…. I pick the colors, the shape, the peep, the heel, even the inside color which only I can see…. My fantasy will come true soon… when the shoes I ordered and personally designed from Altelier Shoes show up on my doorstep!

Yes, you heard me…. Design your own high heeled shoes…. The price is more than your ordinary pair of shoes, but you can get a hot pair for under $300, and I can afford that porn show.

YSL Tributes

Okay, these YSL Tributes have been haunting my dreams since they came out last year. I am obsessed with hooker heels, and these are the ultimate classy call girl shoe. Can you imagine walking in these? These shoes are meant to be walked from your front door to the taxi, from the taxi to your boyfriend’s apartment, and repeat the cycle in reverse the next morning when you go back home, take them off, and put them gingerly in your closet with a dust cloth underneath.

Chanel gun heel

I wonder what Duchamp would have said about these postmodern beauties. So zany, so fun, such walking pieces of pop art! I like the silver variety better than the black, but I’d accept either, and I’d wear them with a minidress cut UP TO HERE like some scary secret agent prostitute from a 1960s James Bond movie.

Christian Louboutin spike heel

Brings new meaning to a spiked heel. These shoes are from forever ago, back during that Rodarte show when all the models wore clothes that looked like they were cut through by a razer blade. Too bad I’ve been wanting them ever since. Sigh. Of all the shoes designed in the last 5 years, this one is my favorite.

Gwen Stefani makes the sexiest shoes EVER

I wanted these so bad, the worst part- my Dad bought them for my MOM for Christmas. She totally rocks them, but now I need a pair. L.A.M.B is Gwen’s label and she has a whole bunch of delicious shoes.

Sparkly Christian Louboutins

I think I posted these on another guide awhile back, but that is just shows you how entirely OBSESSED I am about them. They are also cough my desktop background. cough

Haha.