Gotta Go? A Guide to Boston's Best Bathrooms

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Are you the frequent pit stop type? Do you hate getting stuck in a new city without a clue as to where the finest toilets are? Check out this guide to Boston's cleanest, funkiest, and overall best bathrooms.

Boston Convention Center

Now ain’t that sparkly!

Those shiny bathrooms above live here, at the Convention Center, which straddles Boston and Southie.

Those shiny bathrooms above live here, at the Convention Center, which straddles Boston and Southie.

Penang

685 Washington St, Boston, MA 02111

Penang’s funky wood decor goes all the way back into the bathroom, where high arched ceilings and solid cedar doors invite you. For a bathroom – especially one in this neighborhood – Penang’s is top notch.

Penang’s funky wood decor goes all the way back into the bathroom, where high arched ceilings and solid cedar doors invite you. For a bathroom – especially one in this neighborhood – Penang’s is top notch.

The OtherSide Cafe

While not the NICEST, it’s certainly one of Boston’s coolest bathrooms! And usually pretty clean, too.

Natick Mall

1245 Worcester St, Natick, MA 01760

The “Natick Collection,” as this upscale mall was recently renamed, is full of fancy stores, lovely carpeting and…the best bathrooms in Natick, no doubt. Check out the chandelier!

The “Natick Collection,” as this upscale mall was recently renamed, is full of fancy stores, lovely carpeting and…the best bathrooms in Natick, no doubt. Check out the chandelier!

The spotless, fancy restroom at the Natick Collection mall.

Omni Parker House

60 School Street, Boston, MA 02108

It’s unsurprising that fancy pants Omni Parker House has sparkling clean bathrooms; what’s more surprising is that they let me in to use them!

It’s unsurprising that fancy pants Omni Parker House has sparkling clean bathrooms; what’s more surprising is that they let me in to use them!

Cyclorama

539 Tremont St, Boston, MA 02116

LOVE the Cyclorama’s bare-bones bare-ceiling’d bathrooms. Black toilets, odd shapes. The men’s is even better than the women’s (don’t ask me how I know that!)

LOVE the Cyclorama’s bare-bones bare-ceiling’d bathrooms. Black toilets, odd shapes. The men’s is even better than the women’s (don’t ask me how I know that!)

There are a million reasons to visit the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum, but the million and first is its lovely bathrooms with lovelier French phrases on the walls.

There are a million reasons to visit the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum, but the million and first is its lovely bathrooms with lovelier French phrases on the walls.

As seen in the men's room of the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum...

“Pense moult, parle peu, ecris rien,” or in English: “Think much, speak little, write nothing.”

 

The Charles Hotel

One Bennett Street, Cambridge, MA 02138

The restrooms at the Charles Hotel are fit for a queen! Open to the public (technically speaking) and the diners at all of the Hotel’s restaurants (including the outdoor bar), these fancy bathrooms have floor-to-ceiling doors and warm terrycloth hand towels. Cozy.

The restrooms at the Charles Hotel are fit for a queen! Open to the public (technically speaking) and the diners at all of the Hotel’s restaurants (including the outdoor bar), these fancy bathrooms have floor-to-ceiling doors and warm terrycloth hand towels. Cozy.

Cask'n Flagon

62 Brookline Ave, Boston, MA 02215

Cask’n Flagon, a popular bar with Sox fans, doesn’t disappoint its baseball-loving clientele…it offers them flatscreen TVs on the bathroom walls to ensure they don’t miss a second of the game.

Cask’n Flagon, a popular bar with Sox fans, doesn’t disappoint its baseball-loving clientele…it offers them flatscreen TVs on the bathroom walls to ensure they don’t miss a second of the game.

Cask'n Flagon's Toilet TV

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Thorntons Fenway Grill

100 Peterborough St, Boston, MA 02215

What I like about Thornton’s is this…totally unassuming little bar and grill, great food, but get this – the little one-stall ladies’ room has free feminine products for its patrons. Just too sweet!

What I like about Thornton’s is this…totally unassuming little bar and grill, great food, but get this – the little one-stall ladies’ room has free feminine products for its patrons. Just too sweet!

Christian Science Reading Room

194 Massachusetts Ave, Boston, MA 02115

Boston’s Christian Science Center has some of the fanciest, most stylish bathrooms in town. Godspeed!

Boston’s Christian Science Center has some of the fanciest, most stylish bathrooms in town. Godspeed!

Land of Clean Bathrooms

Christian Science Monitor Church, Boston

Bathrooms to Avoid

We’ve shown you the best of the best, but what about the bathrooms that make holding it in worthwhile?  Here are 5:

  1. Logan Airport.  They’re not the worst in the world, or even in Boston, but they’re by far the worst airport bathrooms I’ve seen in the U.S.  Guess they get cleaned about as often as flights leave on time.
  2. Pho Thien Thien, Chinatown.  The pho might be tasty, but seeing the bathroom might make you want to think twice about eating here.  The lack of soap will make you wonder where employees wash their hands.
  3. Pretty much all Borders Books locations, especially the one on School Street.  Foul.
  4. Charlie’s Kitchen, Cambridge.  For such a great bar, Charlie’s sure has disappointing toilets!  I love this place, but I’d almost rather walk back to my office to pee than go in here again.
  5. The Middle East, Cambridge.  It’s a popular live-music club, so I shouldn’t have really gone in there expecting clean bathrooms, but what I saw was even worse than I could have imagined.  Bummer.

That’s pretty gross.

Just toilettin' around town...

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