Get Into the Geek Galaxy

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Being a geek or having an affinity for "geek culture" is ALMOST cool nowadays. In fact so many of us are closeted geeks waiting for the acceptance to break out of our geeky bunker and shine! Well, you're not alone...there's geeks and geek love abounding. If you fit into any of these geeky categories, you're safe to emerge. GEEK IT OUT.

Typical Geek Stereotypes

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….as they say, stereotypes exist for a reason.

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They have an exclusive club, just like anyone and being a part of that club means knowing how to sign it. Biatch.

Geek's get tattoos TOO.

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They just wouldn’t be caught dead with a tribal band, butterfly, star, Chinese symbol or Irish knot. They’re go straight to the Comic books.

GEEKS LIKE TO COOK

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If you’ve ever tuned into the Food Network, you have some serious geekiness you’re not willing to admit to yet (it’s ok, it takes time) but when you’re ready to come out, there’s someone waiting there for you. Alton Brown.

If a Geek were a butterfly......

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they’d cocoon in this thing. In fact, even if I geek weren’t turning into a butterfly they may hang this in their backyard…..cause it’s simply, that. awesome.

If a Geek had plastic surgery....

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he/she wouldn’t go for the obvious; boobs, nose, lips, etc. But no- he’d most likely go straight for the ears….ELF ’EM baby, elf those ears.

The Geek meets HIP HOP

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You don’t have to throw away your “ness” your “style” if you’re a geek- you can be both geeky and (fill in the blank) at once. Gangster Geeks? Yes they exist. Haven’t you heard N.E.R.D?

Geeks like to get CRUNK and talk about geeky sh*t

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If Geeks are at any loss for friends, they can just get online geekswhodrink.com and get together and you know, drink and be friends.

Geeks like Martha Stewart....

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it’s true. She isn’t mutually exclusive to housewives only.

Geeks have dogs and dogs can be Geeks too.

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point made.

Geeks go to the BIG SCREEN.

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If you haven’t seen it, you must- or you aren’t geeky enough. Point in case that geeks are also HILARIOUS.

Parents should be PROUD of their Geeks!

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Don't worry....geeks get married too.

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Geeks like to COLLECT things

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They just do, it’s a fact. Pez dispensers, Mcdonalds kiddie meal action figures, Magic cards, Star Wars dolls, coins, POGS….whatever.

When a Geek is trying to be cool-

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HE PULLS THEHIPSTERCARD. And buys his clothes form thrift stores, American Apparel and Urban Outiftters….while searching for the geekiest items possible.

Geeks are GAMERS

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The most accurate portrayal of a gamer at his best is in the movie Grandma’s Boy, where the gamers show the ins and outs of gaming life….and all it’s serious geekiness.

When a Geek showers;

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you can BET that they want to memorize the periodic table.

When Geeks decorate their walls.....

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this happens.

When Geeks are REALLY FUNNY.....

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their name is Jimmy Fallon. They then go onto star on Saturday Night Live (starring with many other Geek Greats and walking the path of many former Geek Comis) and make a series of funny films and talk nervously in very interview they EVER do.

If a Geek were German......

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he’d have Ipod controls in his Lederhosen.

The beginning of a new GEEK culture:

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The TWILIGHT FANS. It’s the new Harry Potter or Trekkies. Twilighters.

 

Tina Fey made being a GEEK super cool.

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Sure she’s famous and what not, but geek? ABSOLUTELY. In the most bad ass sense of course.

There is an order to the GEEKNESS

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Emo Geeks made FAMOUS

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Adam Brody is the perfect emo/hipster geek. The one who says awkward things and thus gets the ladies simply because of his nerdiness. He’s the sad boy who like offbeat things and doesn’t know how hot his geekiness is.

Your first instinct is to feel bad for him....

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but rest assured, his extreme geekiness keeps him occupied.

Geeks go PRIMETIME

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Ashton Kutcher, the geekiest punk of them all- wisely disguised as a “hearthrob” decided that he’d do his best to give the geeks some face time, and some nookie- while making beautiful people look like idiots. It really was in their favor.

Geek goes VOGUE

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So once it was seriosuly UNCOOL to be geeky, in any way- glasses and pleated skirts included, and now it’s just fashionable.

If Geeks wore platforms....

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they’d look like this.

Geeks like to play dress up!!

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Geeks are notorious for role play. Or thinking that they’re an anime character come to life, so they go to conventions and were their ridiculously large outfits with bright colors and insane hair do’s and live in all their geek glory.

If a Geek were a cupcake.....

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they’d look like this.

The Geek King of the 90's

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…part of being a true Geek from the inside out, is having a geeky name. If you’re name is John, you’ll only reach a certain geek capacity.

When a Geek needs to cool off....

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they turn on their bat fan, obviously.

Geeks are NOT above wearing slogan tee's.

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Especially if they involve social networking references.

If a Geek drove a car- it'd probably look something like this.

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....AND they have unique wedding cakes.

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If a Geek wants a head massage....

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it better look like something from another galaxy.

Geeky Hipster girls look like this.

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Don’t forget that she’s most likely into photography, wears odd shaped glasses, has oversized headphones and used to love Sailor Moon, she still has her lunch pail with all the characters on it that she now uses as a pencil cases for her impromptu bout’s of sketching.

....they REALLY love Guitar Hero

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since many of them aren’t actually equipped enough to be great at ACTUAL GUITAR. That’d rip them away from the computer screen for far too long and may involve REAL human interaction. ACK!

If a Geek were KING....

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He’d look like this guy. In fact, let’s promote him to King, he’s not messing around.

If you give a Geek a cookie....

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might I advise that they be shaped like Tetris pieces.

A PICTURE OF WHAT HAPPENS WHEN GEEKS MEDITATE.

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Geeks love, LOVE Lord of the Rings.

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They’re the people that ask for the life size cut out of Frodo at the movie theater and put him in their kitchen at home.

When Geek's get sporty:

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They play Ping Pong and better yet- they make it functional by turning their screen door into half a ping pong table that can fold up anytime they feel like a match!

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Discussions

-621041618

awesome. I just saw star trek.

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Such a comprehensive guide, wow!

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There’s only one word for this guide: definitive. And Gillian, you suck (as usual) for stealing my comment!

About The Author

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The pod of Mother Earth
You know you're going to give your kid a complex if you call them "The Mean Bean" instead of; sweetiepie, sugar face, bear, etc. My nickname stuck- even when I got nicer. AND my affinity for all things BEAN happens to be tremendous; Coffee beans (my coffee feign), Cocoa beans, Vanilla beans, chic...