Eight Ways To Kill Time During Labor Day In New York City

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It's the last official holiday weekend of the summer. Hope you had a blast, because now we all have to prepare for turkey and regretful family gatherings, FOLLOWED by four months of a bleak Chekhovian existence (read: winter). I don't know about the rest of you, but after Labor Day, I usually tend to drink myself into a dark oblivion. When I wake up it's the end of April, and I've lost so much weight! Anyway, before we all break out the J. Crew sweaters and pretend like Thanksgiving even matters, let's party it up one last time in The Big Apple! WOOT! ...Damn, is it just me or is everything expensive in this town?

Crash A College Party

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It’s Labor Day Weekend, which means only one thing if you’re a New York college student: first weekend alone in the city. With all the experienced upperclassmen come freshmen. This would be where pulling some strings (i.e. calling up that distant third cousin you never talk to) would come in handy to meeting some co-eds… or at least being able to party like an idiot. Drinking on Sunday? Who cares – you don’t have class until 11:30 on Tuesday!

Trader Joes Wine Shop

138 E 14th St, New York, NY 10003

For all your cheap booze needs. Don’t worry – early twentysomethings ARE impressed by a box o’ wine.

For all your cheap booze needs. Don’t worry – early twentysomethings ARE impressed by a box o’ wine.

Go See Sonic Youth

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Didn’t they already play a FREE concert on July 4th? Yes, and it was awesome. So awesome, that Sonic Youth is back in town to close out the summer at McCarren Park Pool in Brooklyn. This show guarantees a longer set, three additional opening acts, and a blow-out performance; it’s the last to ever be played at McCarren before the city converts it back into a municipal pool. Bring ear plugs; if you missed Lollapalooza, this will definitely make up for it.

Planet Rose

219 Avenue A Frnt 2, New York, NY 10009

After Thurston Moore and his crew make your eardrums bleed, hop back on the L Train and rupture your equilibrium some more at Planet Rose karaoke. Before you ask, yes – I will be there, and yes, I will be singing “Night Moves”.

After Thurston Moore and his crew make your eardrums bleed, hop back on the L Train and rupture your equilibrium some more at Planet Rose karaoke. Before you ask, yes – I will be there, and yes, I will be singing “Night Moves”.

Brave The Jitney

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It’s the last weekend you can make it out to the Hamptons. You’re planning on leaving early, right? Like – I don’t know – 9:00 in the morning? Because otherwise expect crowds… lots of them. The Jitney is the great equalizer of New York summers. The only mode of transport where the old money of the city has to rub elbows with the great unwash (read: you and I). A couple of hours of traffic on the LIE, cramped quarters, oh yeah – and the beaches will probably be packed all weekend. I love Labor Day!

Hermes of Paris

691 Madison Ave, New York, NY 10065

Pick up a designer beach towel. At $400 and up, shouldn’t something you’re going to chuck into the dryer be just as classy as you are?

Pick up a designer beach towel. At $400 and up, shouldn’t something you’re going to chuck into the dryer be just as classy as you are?

Pretend It's 1988

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Oh boy, now this is what summer can really be all about: classic ‘80s horror flicks. The Brooklyn Academy of Music (BAM) is running a four film retrospect on Mr. Horror himself, John Carpenter. It kicks off on Labor Day with his sci-fi/horror epic, THEY LIVE. Here’s all you need to know: zombie aliens, Rowdy Roddy Piper, and lots of guns. See you at the 9:00 show.

Brooklyn Academy of Music

30 Lafayette Ave, Brooklyn, NY 11217

Let the fight for humanity begin!

Let the fight for humanity begin!

 

Campaign For Your Presidential Candidate

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I cried the other night watching Obama’s speech. For real. I haven’t been this pumped for an election since… Howard Dean (hey, I was in college – we all have a right to experiment). Anyway, no I won’t be voting for McCain, but I do encourage everyone TO VOTE. The 2008 Election is not only historic, but more important than ever. So, here’s a crazy idea – all you would-be political pundits – why not get the word out about your candidate? It’s your country, dude.

Mud Coffee

307 East 9th Street New York, NY 10003

Fuel up on a double espresso latte. You’ll need it for all the phone calls you’re going to make from Obama’s (or McCain’s, groan) downtown headquarters.

Watch The U.S. Open... From Manhattan

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Just trying to kill time before the NFL season starts next weekend? So are the rest of us. It’s the U.S. Open! It happens only once year! It’s super-expensive and schlep to get to! Therefore, do what most of us will probably be doing – head down to Madison Square Park on 23rd Street and catch the whole event on the Open’s HD Jumbotron broadcast. There’s also some fun events and activities there, like Wii tennis and hitting on the event staff.

Just remember to brown bag it, if you must.

Just remember to brown bag it, if you must.

Hit It Up Coney Island Before They Tear It Down... Right?

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The Sword of Damocles has been hanging over Astroland for two years now, with no definite end in sight. Developers want to turn it into a high-end hipster beach community, the rest of us are wondering if we’re talking about the same place. Anyway, before anyone blows up the beach, get down there for the last weekend of the season to catch the Freak Show, walk the broadwalk, and ride the deathly Cyclone. It’s America’s most-beloved death trap!

Nathan's Famous Hot Dogs

1310 Surf Avenue Brooklyn, NY 11224

Oh yeah, stop by Nathan’s and grab a hot dog while you’re down there, too. Yes, it’s not fifty cents anymore, but it’s soooo good.

Labor Day Extravaganza!

Write A Topical Guide For Guidespot

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I personally loved writing this guide, because it gave me no excuse to sit around in my apartment all weekend and look up my ex-girlfriends in Facebook. Plus, I love this work. C’mon think about it: it only takes about an hour and a half to put one of these things together. Be awesome, share your knowledge with the rest of the internet. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to NYU freshmen mixer!

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Discussions

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Wow, our Labor Day guides are completely different! Um, and I don’t know how you write guides in an hour and a half…wow.

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TWO BUCK CHUCK!!!!

About The Author

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matt_fried Rss 

Brooklyn
I'm a writer and comedian living in Brooklyn. You may've seen me around town at The Peoples Improv Theater, Upright Citizens Brigade Theater and Under St. Marks. I write funny stuff and maintain the blog, Sssh, don't tell anybody, but every single female Guidetripper and Maven is crushing on m...