Bertha Lynn

Bertha has been bringing us the news in Denver for three decades. She is always professional, always articulate, and dammit, she looks great. I have never heard anyone say a bad word about Bertha.

Isaak Slade

It is very rare for a local Denver band to break out and become major-label superstars. The Fray is the only band in recent memory to jump from small clubs in the Mile-High city to playing Leno and Letterman and selling records by the millions. The lead singer of the Fray, Isaak, still lives right here in D-town. I spot him a lot at St. Marks Coffeehouse and checking out shows at the Hi-Dive. Say hello to him, he’s a nice guy.

Jake Jabs

After 30 years of doing TV commercials you think that Jake would get better at it. No such luck. I am still waiting for him to meet his end in the jaws of a tiger. What a brilliant Ziegfried and Roy ending that would be for this aging sofa-peddler.

Blinky the Clown

For forty years Blinky amused kids every afternoon on local Denver TV. Many of my friends celebrated their 5th or 6th birthday in his “Fun Club” studio. Channel 2 may have tossed out the clown a decade ago, but he continues to hang around. Almost every afternoon you can spot him sitting outside his tiny antique store on South Broadway, looking grumpy.

Maris the Great

Until I met Maris I thought that Tom Cruise was the scariest person in the world. Growling, screaming, and covered in blood, Maris has been a fixture on the Denver concert scene for over a decade. Always in costume, always in character, and (perhaps most confusingly) openly gay, Maris is a sight to behold. I have heard rumors that he is, in the daylight hours, an RTD Bus Driver, but this remains unconfirmed.

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The Honorable John Hickenlooper

Our Mayor was a local celebrity even before he ran for political office. When he opened The Wynkoop Brewing Company 25 years ago no one had ever heard of a “Microbrew” and the vacant and abandoned buildings down by Union Station were certainly not the fashionable Lodo district we know today. He is a true pioneer, and on top of that, a really nice and friendly guy. Next time he zips past on his scooter, give him a thumbs-up.

The Shagman

The endless stream of commercials for Rocky’s Auto that must be endured by anyone who watches late night TV is one of the most challenging things about life in Denver. They are bad. They have always been bad and they take a strange pride in thier awfulness. The Shagman, and his pals Audra and Officer O’Dell, are sadly part of the cultural landscape of our city. The fact that I went to college with the Shagman, and that at one time he was a truly gifted stage actor, make the commercials seem even more tragic.

Sid Pink

Just like in Hollywood, there are A-List Celebs, and D-List Celebs. Welcome to the D-List, your host will be Mr. Sid Pink. He is an Emcee, a Comic, and an “Entertainer”. He lives on the edge of the downtown hipster scene and seems to never go away. I just want to know where he finds those clothes.

Dealin' Doug

You will know him by his tan. It is an unbelievable tan. And he wears a ring on every single finger of his hands. He is like a hybrid of George Hamilton, Mr. T, and John Madden. And any night of the week he will shout at you from your TV. Nobody beats a Dealing Doug Deal. Nobody.

Tom Martino

I find it inspiring that a man can become a trusted and crusading comsumer advocate even if he looks just like a sleazy used-car salesman. Way to go, Tom!

Pictured in Icon:

The Barrelman. The degenerate alcoholic that goes to every Bronco game wearing only a hat and a can.