Vanity + Photoshop = Awesomely Cheap...I Mean Personal Holiday Gifts

Get Into Character

Make sure to be convincing. To prepare for this photo I ate nothing but cornmeal for a week, and I think viewers are really penetrated by the resulting image of yearning, fear and pride.

Consider The Weather

Due to a relatively long fall last year in Chicago, I was able to snag a few calendar photos outside. You may be shivering in those short shorts, but the authentic porch background will make the gift all the more meaningful to its recipient.

All you need is a few flowers to blend convincingly with a stolen backdrop.

Pose With Gifts The Recipient Gave You

I always knew that little chick would come in handy.

Borrow Your Mom's Hawaiin Mumu

Learn How To Use Your Flash Timer

After about the 5th elaborate photoshoot, your friends may start to lose interest in being your photographer. That’s when you set up your camera on a pile of books and use the automatic timer.

Photo Bobblehead

Personalized Russian Dolls

Photo Mug

Spare No Details In Setting

Take the time to set the scene for each photo. Every cocktail umbrella counts when you’re making a calendar. Remember this rule, and your relatives will never want to turn the page to a new month!

And don’t forget, the taller the hair, the closer to God.

And If The Weather Fails You...

…there’s no reason you cannot be digitally transported to a tropical Bolivian forest, or the lush gardens of Giverny. Even if you don’t have Photoshop, these feats can be accomplished using Paint.

The Wonders Of Windows Paint

This was another Guidespotter’s brilliant contribution in the guide, “2009 Predictions,” made entirely on paint. Imagine the possibilities!

Pose Quickly With Pumpkins In Jewel Parking Lot

Before the security guard asks you to leave.

Also consider color enhancement. They definitely don’t make pumpkins this orange in the inner-city Chicago.

Remember, The Universe Of Fantastically Ugly Sweaters Transcends Christmas

When You Realize You Forgot To Do July 2 Hours Before Your Proof Is Due...

…don’t forget the importance of stock photography.

Awkward Mousepad

Portrait On An Apron

Remember, Kim Kardashian Did It, So It Must Be Cool

I’m not really sure how she got her boobs to do that. I take solace in the fact that I doubt she could pull off the pilgrim shot.