.jpg "Remember 90's Love in New York City")
.jpg "Defeat Your New York Enemy")
.jpg "Being a Cool Nerd in New York")
.jpg "New York Makes Emo Boys Cry")
.jpg "aubreeWYATTsmith")
.jpg "Your Cheap Friend's Guide to NYC")
.jpg "Mother's Day Cards to Someone Else's Mom")
.jpg "What Do You Want on Your Tombstone?")
.jpg "Clever Modern Design")
.jpg "Yoga Classes The Florida Yoga Institute")
.jpg "Yoga in Fort Myers & Bonita")
.jpg "Fresh Produce in San Francisco")
.jpg "Awkward Family Portraits will make you say \"WTF?\"")
.jpg "Failbook")
.jpg "Insane Celebrity Portrait Tattoos")
.jpg "Will You Go to Duct Tape Prom With Me?")
SPONSORED LISTINGS
The Clueless Spy's Guide to New York City
- by aubreewyattsmith
- -
- August 28, 2008
(7)
.jpg)
Get yourself together! Espionage is hard, treacherous work and you'll need all the right accoutrements if you plan to do this right. This guide will do its best to help you with that and with some places to go for much-needed research. But really now, you'll have to do some legwork yourself, my clueless friend. Guidespotter's Note: Please burn after reading
New York Look
30 Lincoln Plaza 1886, New York, NY 10023
Get yourself a fashionable trench coat in the off-season on the sale rack. The New York Look often carries some great French designers at up to 75% off. Go straight to the back of the store and don’t let the pushy salespeople get too involved.
Get yourself a fashionable trench coat in the off-season on the sale rack. The New York Look often carries some great French designers at up to 75% off. Go straight to the back of the store and don’t let the pushy salespeople get too involved.
Moscow On Hudson
1920 Avenue U, Brooklyn, NY 11229
There’s also a Moscow on the Hudson on 181st street in Washington Heights. “Sergei…Sergei, get me a salamata and some Kefir while you’re at at. Today is going to be long day. Many lamps to light before morning.”
There’s also a Moscow on the Hudson on 181st street in Washington Heights. “Sergei…Sergei, get me a salamata and some Kefir while you’re at at. Today is going to be long day. Many lamps to light before morning.”
Swiss Army Brands Inc
136 Prince Street, New York, NY 10012
A really “together” spy would have a watch that did at least 14 different useful things, but you can start with one that tells time accurately in more than one zone.
A really “together” spy would have a watch that did at least 14 different useful things, but you can start with one that tells time accurately in more than one zone.
BrickHouse Security
980 Avenue of the Americas New York, NY 10018
You’ll really need a lockpicking toolkit, now, won’t you? GPS? That’s the spirit. Swing into BrickHouse Security on Sixth Avenue for all of your spy accessory needs.
Who says spies can’t look good? Ever heard of a honey trap?
Lord & Taylor
424 5th Avenue, New York, NY 10018
You’ll need sunglasses for sure. Big honking ones. Look for discount Dolce and Gabbanas, preferably with rear view capability. No one said you couldn’t be fashionable and observant. In fact, you might look entirely conspicuous as a fashion flop in this city.
You’ll need sunglasses for sure. Big honking ones. Look for discount Dolce and Gabbanas, preferably with rear view capability. No one said you couldn’t be fashionable and observant. In fact, you might look entirely conspicuous as a fashion flop in this city.
James Bond Gunbarrels
I’m quite fond of the newest Bond, actually. Looking forward to “Quantum of Solace”…
The Clueless Spy's Guide to NYC
You can follow a map, can’t you?
Smoking Stop
45 Christopher Street, New York, NY 10014
Going out for a cigar, cigarette, or pipe is an excellent excuse to follow someone’s lead or even strike up conversation with a “fellow” smoker. Other than to cope with stress, why did you think so many spies were lighting up in movies?
Going out for a cigar, cigarette, or pipe is an excellent excuse to follow someone’s lead or even strike up conversation with a “fellow” smoker. Other than to cope with stress, why did you think so many spies were lighting up in movies?
Tea & Sympathy Inc
108 Greenwich Avenue, New York, NY 10011
Because even the deepest undercover Brit agent would find time in his day for tea. Just imagine yourself as a character from a John Le Carre book.
Because even the deepest undercover Brit agent would find time in his day for tea. Just imagine yourself as a character from a John Le Carre book.
MI-5 Bar/Cocktails
52 Walker Street New York, NY 10013
When the Brits set their mind to something, whether it be colonizing in a foreign land, invading the States with their Rock and Roll, or taking up espionage in earnest, they rarely do it halfway. Not only is it the UK’s counter-intelligence branch and a hugely entertaining BBC series (known as “Spooks” across the pond), MI-5 is also now a bar on Walker Street. Why not at least get the feel for the spying game at this dark downtown bar?
Ricky's
590 Broadway, New York, NY 10012
You’ll need at least three good wigs. The staff at Ricky’s is always happy to oblige, especially for paying customers.
You’ll need at least three good wigs. The staff at Ricky’s is always happy to oblige, especially for paying customers.
ABC Language Exchange
135 W 29th Street 1204, New York, NY 10001
Your foreign language skills will need to be in top form if you’re going to make it in this underworld. Schedule in 2 classes in lesser-known languages if you want to get noticed by your superiors. And no, high school French and Spanish don’t count.
Your foreign language skills will need to be in top form if you’re going to make it in this underworld. Schedule in 2 classes in lesser-known languages if you want to get noticed by your superiors. And no, high school French and Spanish don’t count.
Russian Vodka Room
265 W 52nd Street, New York, NY 10019
The RVR. There will be a fat man at the piano, groups of comrades gathered, singing songs from the Old Country, a surly manager in a sport coat, and lean blonde cocktail waitresses. Do your best to fit in. Order the Wildberry Luksusowa up or on the rox and the Tulka sandwich Odessa style. If you see “reserved” signs up on the tables, that’s okay; you’ve just got to come in looking good or with someone good-looking on our arm. You’ll get a seat.
The RVR. There will be a fat man at the piano, groups of comrades gathered, singing songs from the Old Country, a surly manager in a sport coat, and lean blonde cocktail waitresses. Do your best to fit in. Order the Wildberry Luksusowa up or on the rox and the Tulka sandwich Odessa style. If you see “reserved” signs up on the tables, that’s okay; you’ve just got to come in looking good or with someone good-looking on our arm. You’ll get a seat.
LeSportsac
1065 Madison Avenue New York, NY 10028
As a spy, you will need to travel light and often. Be prepared for any kind of trip, be it short, long, or unpredictable with the right kind of luggage. Check out LeSportsac on the Upper East Side for some very durable, classy totes.
Helpful Reads for the Clueless Spy
1. The Sword and the Shield
2. Comrade J
3. Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy
Guides We Think You'll Like
- |
- |
- |
- |
- share this
.jpg "Matt Fried")
-
I know nothing of this Russian Vodka Room – please continue.
-
this is great.
.jpg "snitch")
-
I’m going to the RVR for a Tulka sandwich Odessa style tonight around 9. I’ll be the fellow in the back with the black chanel briefcase and the sunglasses. Meet me for a Luksusowa on the rox, come alone.
Add Our Widget To Your Site
.jpg)
Discussions