El Guapo's Guide to Surviving the Financial Crisis
- by elguapo
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- March 20, 2009
(48)
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Shit man, you got some serious love in these here comments!
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I was law school poor once. Now I’m just blogger poor. There is not much difference. But in law school I once resorted to trying to give myself a haircut with swiss army knife scissors to save the $12 I would have spent on a haircut. That was damn poor. It turned out pretty badly….
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Way to encourage people to give blood! For those who are law-school poor, platelets are another fine option, as you can donate up to twice a week!
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El Guapo appreciates your support. I’ll try to keep the love flowin, Acorn.
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your posts are hilarious. keep the love comin’
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Awesome post! Definitely agreed. Keep it coming Guapo
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No Prob MSwinney. I’ll be here all week.
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Thanks for the tips, El Guapo! ….Although I don’t think donating blood sounds very appealing. All in all very, very helpful!
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GFINSTER: You are so wise GFINSTER. You seem like you must be an excellent guide yourself. Perhaps a Sherpa.
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Megsmariani: thanks for the nice words. El Guapo will try his best…
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I can give up Golden Tee but I could not handle losing Sega Bass Fishing… That would be absurd!
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El Guapo you write one good blog. Keep them coming…
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Sorry Jowen Didn’t mean to offend you with the pork comment. No pork for El Guapo either. Not if Grandpa McMaverick Pants has anything to do with it. That guy is one helleva anti-pork crusader. Not to mention a Maverick… I definitely encourage you to write about your eating and pooping habits on the Gspot. I look forward to your guide. El Porko
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No Pork? I should cancel my membership to this blog. Funny you mention that though, because I was going to start recommending sando’s to get at quiznos for your $5.43, but I ran out of comment space. 600 characters is short. Anyway, the sandwich I planned on starting with: the HAM and swiss…all you do is have them add italian dressing to that baby and it’s the best sandwich on their menu. Well, that’s debatable. I also like the tuna a lot. I think I’ma start a blog about sandwiches, and my daily eating and crapping habits. Ok, no I wont, dont wanna steal your thunder Guapo.
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Amusing, you should go on tour and do one of these for each major city… especially New York (or at least Manhattan)
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I didn’t get a single cookie last time they took my blood. I got a whole damn pack of Oreos! And an “I gave blood sticker” that i’m sure I could barter with a child for something else cool. Excellent call on the bloodbank – hope you didn’t just let the secret out…only so many Oreos to go around during times like these. Funny as hell, Senor Gaucho.
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Shelley72r Correct. El Guapo es Rad.
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Jowen, so true…so very very true. You are wise like Yoda and your frugality knows no bounds. I am duly impressed. If I had to guess I would say there are no pork products on your sandwiches..
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El Guapo, you are rad. Keep the tips coming please.
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Firstly, if you’re using your $5 on a Subway 5 dollar footlong, you’re already wasting. The quizno’s $5 large sandwich is not only larger, but much tastier. Disregard that they charge $0.43 tax (subway is $5 out the door), you can easily take $0.43 worth of pickle slices and salt and pepper packets. I like to separate my large quizno’s sub into breakfast and lunch — or early lunch and mid-afternoon snack time — so you’re actually only paying $2.50 per meal (plus half of $0.43). Also a great money saver: using old transfers to ride the bus, works like a charm in SF
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good one. I’m a big fan of sampling at Costco. Between the $1.50 hot dog that I’ve never failed to get and the abundance of trail mix and microwave ravioli samples, I always leave costco fat and happy.
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I love it, funny and resourceful. a widely overlooked but clutch money saving venture is free sampling at Whole foods. In addition to the many demos they have, no one ever questions people who sample at the prepared food section. You are a concerned consumer looking for “quality.” Between the olives and cheese you can leave pretty full and happy.
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Thanks Dominic. Good point. Don’t know how I missed that one. I’m gonna have to add illegal street racing to the list.
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(13) Why not support the hurting oil industry and burn some rubber on the streets. You can race for cash, Goochi apparel, NOS and pink slips to supplement the welfare checks! Ask any racer, any REAL racer… it doesn’t matter if you win by siphoning gas out from your best friends hoopty while he’s at work, winning’s winning. [applause] Thumbs up for Guapo! Thumbs down for 10 second quarter miles.
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Thanks Laurmingon. Let me know when you actually pull the trigger with the Nordstrom’s scam so I can add your mugshot to this guide
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cute. i have contemplated the nordstrom thing before!
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Hahaha. “Just one Rib”. I believe that would be from the classic movie “I’m gonna get you Sucka”. Oh Mr. Rock, you certainly have come a long way…
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i love it. unfortunately, the red cross won’t take my blood because i was born in nigeria (yes, fer rilz), BUT the rest of these gems of glowing insight will be tucked away in a highly accessible pocket…a pocket right over my heart. (btw, #11 reminds me of Chris Rock’s first movie role, where he haggles with the guy at the diner to buy “just one rib” and have the soda poured into his hands instead of a cup…ha…so funny).
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hahaha. Thanks Cornelius. Challah and guac. good call, although I like to think of myself as more of matzoh balls and pico de gallo type guy. Challa bitches!!
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Hilarious. This was so funny that it made me forget how poor I am. Thanks El Guapo. P.S. I do love me a sexy JewFro with a Mexican name…its like Challah with guacamole…mmmm
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Captainplanit: I have a friend who had a band called Miracle Chosuke. They were pretty sweet. Not as cool as the original though
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To VannessaMoore: Mostly I just get free shots because I know the bartender. One time I came in third.
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“Brazilliant” . I once had a shirt that said Brazilliant. It was awesome and can be purchased for $14.95 at Wickedsweet.com
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If I play Monopoly at Mickey D’s in my new Pama’s, do I magically save more $$?? Braziliant El Guapo!!!
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El Guapo you are so insightful! I never knew you could make money playing trivia at bars.
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To theglabe: a little over the top, no? But you are correct, at least in one respect. El Guapo es muy handsome.
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El guapo says thank you
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hahaha. Very entertaining guide – and certainly something nice to read about one of the nicest cities around. can’t wait for the next blog mr. guapo
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Other than An Idiot’s guide to surviving an economic apocalypse this is now the shining beacon in my collection of a hobo’s lifetime library.
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Very funny and resourceful guide! You certainly know the ins and outs of Chicago. Can’t wait to visit.
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This is the single greatest blog post I have ever read in my life. Both humorous and life altering, it has changed my perspective on the world and myself, I find the post to be well written, astute and thoughtfully crafted. I love el guapo, he is handsome.
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If I had a nickel for everytime Miracle Chosuke kicked my ass in Lee Trevino’s Fighting golf, I’d be able to afford a sweet Ralph Laurenzo polo shirt.
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I wish I lived in Chicago so I could try out the tips in this guide!
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