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Why Chicago Hates The CTA
- by coffee_slut
- -
- October 23, 2008
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"...We expect to be moving shortly." If you've ever taken a ride on the CTA, or you use this as your daily transportation, you know it's one of the WORST transit systems in the world. However, here's a scary fact. Chicago did once rule the world with it's transit system back in the day. What happened? I don't know about you, but sitting on the train for an hour to get downtown from Addison is NOT worth my $2.00, thank you. Read on, my friends, and see why we Chicagoans HATE the CTA.
The Chicago Transit Nightmare. I mean "Authority"
You Might Pee Your Pants
Waiting for the CTA train or bus could take as long as 45 minutes. So, be sure to pee before leaving or you might find yourself working those abdominal muscles more than you anticipated. I have found myself in this predicament all too often, thinking I would have time once I reached my destination. I haven’t quite reached the breaking point, but I’m sure it’s happened to others.
The Tracks Are Fine
“We are standing still momentarily due to construction ahead. You’re patience is appreciated.”
PATIENCE?! WHAT PATIENCE?!
Let them be. They didn’t kill anyone before, not that I’m aware of anyway, but that’s not the point! The point is, it’s slowing us down!
Yes, the train platforms were falling apart and smelled like piss, but who cares? Just get me to and from where I want to go… and FAST!
You Will Become Broke
Ok, ok the CTA is better than driving and YES gas prices are high. HOWEVER, they are taking all of our money to fix these wooden slats called tracks.
I am broke! Ok, not completely from taking the CTA, but they don’t help me out at all, that’s for sure. Soon $2.00 a ride will become $3.00. I remember back in the day when it was $1.50. That was 2 or 3 years ago.
This is a difficult case to fight, but let me try another angle… the economy! Yes, the economy is so bad that I can’t afford $2.00 a ride. There, see you will become broke from riding the CTA.
Second City the
1616 N Wells St, Chicago, IL 60614
Everyone needs a good laugh. Laugh at the CTA, because there is nothing else you can do about it! They say laughter is the best medicine. Go see an improv show! Second City is one of the best in this city!
There are tons of fun bars around here too before and after the show.
Everyone needs a good laugh. Laugh at the CTA, because there is nothing else you can do about it! They say laughter is the best medicine. Go see an improv show! Second City is one of the best in this city!
There are tons of fun bars around here too before and after the show.
Here are some tips
- Ride your bike instead. Better gear up for the winter!
- Bum rides from your friends who have cars and split gas costs.
- Bring a nice novel for the train, if you decide to continue riding it.
- Bring a nice friend on the train with you.
- ALWAYS have your ipod or some listening device. (This will keep you sane.)
- Get to know your neighbors on the train. Sometimes all you end up doing is people watching. Just begin a conversation.
- Have an escape plan. If you are sitting too long, find an emergency exit and jump.
H & M
22 N State St, Chicago, IL 60602
Go shopping on your way home. This always makes me feel better. Even if I’m buying a little dinky key chain or some socks. I must relieve some of that stress.
Just a WARNING: The skinny jeans are fun here, but if you’re sitting too long on the train, they might cut into your circulation.
Go shopping on your way home. This always makes me feel better. Even if I’m buying a little dinky key chain or some socks. I must relieve some of that stress.
Just a WARNING: The skinny jeans are fun here, but if you’re sitting too long on the train, they might cut into your circulation.
Chicago Rest Stops
CTA Trip Planner
At lest they’ve got this going for ’em. The trip planner. This website allows you to plan your trip from one destination to the other. It also gives you an “estimated” time of arrival.
Don’t rely on that though.
FREE Crap on Craigslist (Chicago)
Go ahead. Treat yourself!
Your Guide to Biking In Chicago
Just ride your bike! It’s much faster.
The Voice of The CTA Is Getting Old
Bob is the name I have given the voice of the CTA. We hear him on our commutes to work, school, and home. Is anyone else growing tired of him? “The next stop is…”
His voice even resounds through the streets and bounces off of buildings. We need a new voice. Someone with a bit more personality.
I would actually enjoy a nice British accent to listen to everyday.
Anyone do voice overs?
Carol's Pub Inc
4659 N Clark St, Chicago, IL 60640
Tired of hearing Bob’s voice? Relax, grab a beer here. This place brings out my Southern roots and my cowgirl boots. Cheep beer and a fun atmosphere is all I ask for after a stressful day. Yehaw!
Tired of hearing Bob’s voice? Relax, grab a beer here. This place brings out my Southern roots and my cowgirl boots. Cheep beer and a fun atmosphere is all I ask for after a stressful day. Yehaw!
A Test Was Conducted by... Coffee Slut
True story:
I left a lunch date with my boyfriend one sunny afternoon. I rode my bike back home and he took the CTA. While on my way home I decided to stop by Comcast to return an unwanted modem. Then, I decided to stop and grab an espresso and call my mom. On the ride home, the wind was so strong that I had to pull over and rest from the intensity, so I decided to check out some flowers at a nearby market.
Finally, almost 45 minutes later, I made my way up Grace and turned into my driveway. As I gathered my keys, I looked up and my boyfriend was walking towards me. He just got off the bus.
The Point is…
What could be a 20 minute bus ride home, always turns into almost an hour ride home!
Peet's Coffee and Tea
1000 W North Ave, Chicago, IL 60622
Grab a coffee before or after your ride. If you’re on the Red Line, get off at North and Clybourn for a nice cup of coffee or tea here. When I get coffee here, I am always distracted by the Whole Foods next door.
Just go to the bathroom before ya hop back on that train.
Grab a coffee before or after your ride. If you’re on the Red Line, get off at North and Clybourn for a nice cup of coffee or tea here. When I get coffee here, I am always distracted by the Whole Foods next door.
Just go to the bathroom before ya hop back on that train.
Your Brain Could Shake Loose
You know when you ride a roller coaster and you have the worst headache afterwards? That is what it’s like riding the CTA train.
The first time I rode the train, I felt like the dumbest person on the planet, while holding on for dear life. My brain cells were so shaken up that I thought I would leave the train deaf, dumb, and psycho. However, I now am used to being beaten up on the CTA. The shaking of one’s body moving back and forth, takes some getting used to. (So does being psycho.)
If you feel slightly more dumb when you leave the train, just know your brain has probably been shaken loose a bit.
Spa Space
165 N Canal St, Chicago, IL 60606
You will need a massage after a long day on the train. Ask them to massage your head as well. Feels good after all of that brain jostling.
You will need a massage after a long day on the train. Ask them to massage your head as well. Feels good after all of that brain jostling.
Everyone Is So Nice
Don’t get me wrong. I like nice people, just not on the train.
Sometimes I notice when I get on a packed train, that there is obviously room in the middle section. No one moves in and no one says MOVE IT! Everyone simply stands there and smiles at one another whispering, “Excuse me, please.” Just push them out of the way! You have to MAKE THE ROOM!
Ok, whew. Got that off my chest.
The Music Sucks
Ya think maybe we could get some better musicians in the subway? That’s all I ask right now, please. The 80’s ballad love songs are getting a bit old.
Hurry! You Might Miss The Red Line!
No late nights for anyone during the weekdays.
The Red Line stops running underground, going north, after 9 pm on weekdays. So if you live anywhere from Harrison to North and Clybourn, you’re screwed! They run the trains on the Brown Line tracks, above ground!
I made this mistake one evening after work. It was exactly 9 pm and I missed the last underground train. I was really upset because I missed a House episode.
CTA can you start selling Tvo as a reimbursement?
RIDE AT YOUR OWN RISK!
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Let’s also consider that if you’re living in Wicker Park for five weeks, and you spend your days in Wrigleyville, there’s apparently no way to get there via CTA?!? You have to take a crosstown bus and THEN a train?!? Or you have to take the Blue Line all the way down to the South Loop, hike through a massive transfer corridor, and then backtrack on the Red Line?!? Aaaaarrrrrrggggghhhhhh!!!!!!
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