Yogi Berra

He’s famous for saying “It ain’t over ‘til it’s over.” Well, Yogi my man, it may be over soon. We will miss you.

Chuck Barris

He created some of our favorite TV game shows while living a double life as a CIA operative. But Chuck Barris will turn 80 this year, and I predict will not turn 81.

Yoko Ono

She’s gotten a bad rap over the years. McCartney broke up the Beatles because he sucked and knew that both Lennon and Harrison were exponentially more talented than him. Yoko had nothing to do with it.

She’s pushing 80 and hasn’t said much in the past two decades. It may be time to call it an existence.

Bill Kristol

If we’re gonna be this morbid, might as well kill off the deserving. Can I will Puffy to his demise as well while I’m at it?!

Nick Nolte

It’s a good thing I’m not a County Coroner because if I saw this guy coming through the door, I would’ve labeled him DOA. And I ain’t talking about the excellent video game featuring a bevy of scantily clad women that fight solely to sate my prurient interests. DOA).

Noam Chomsky

One of the greatest men alive, for the time being.

New 90210 Skinny Ickies

The new 90210 is a disgusting mess of unhealthy girls… Starving themselves so they can compete with the demands of LA. One weighs 90 pounds, while the other weighs 100 pounds…

In the old and original 90210, Dylan would not have hooked up with these chicks, and Brenda would have eaten them.

Verne Troyer AKA Mini Me

I was surprised to learn this guy wasn’t dead already. If the drinking doesn’t get him, surely hooking up with 6’ yoga instructors will.

Morgan Freeman

I hate to say it because I love his movies and his voice but he could be a possibility. I love Shawshank Redemption – an all time favorite.

Michael Stipe

Once the REM tour winds down, he will meet his maker. You’ll be missed.

Allison Hannigan

She’s really cute and it would be highly unlikely, that’s why she’s on my list.

Bill Buckner

Obscure since his fatal mistake with the Red Sox in 1986, Buckner’s imminent death will bring dozens of news stories and many appearances by Mookie Wilson.

Ted Kennedy

A brain tumor doesn’t tend to prolong a life. Sorry, Ted, you’ve had a good run.

Bo Jackson

I was wrong about this one 10yrs ago, but I’m trying again. Not that I’m “trying” exactly but-
If he dies it was just pure luck.
Well, not luck exactly….

I don’t want to play this game anymore.

Amy Winehouse

Did I even have to put this one on here???

I wish someone would take care of her. Man, oh man.

Billy Graham

It starts with a “fall” at home, and doesn’t take long for it to end with a pine box.