An English Teacher's Worst Nightmare OR Books I Gave Up Trying to Read
- by elisa
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- July 23, 2009
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I'm a pretty voracious reader, but I'm not really the most patient person in the world. So, if a book fails to reel me in, I usually give up, because really, who wants to put time and effort into a cruddy book? But at the same time, I'm sort of embarrassed for being such a quitter, especially when someone brings up how "The Unbearable Lightness of Being" changed their life. But I digress. Want to join the Guidespot Book (Quitter) Club?
Infinite Jest
I heard such good things about David Foster Wallace so I really wanted to read something of his. And I heard amazing things about this book. So, done. Except it’s like a billion pages. And I was totally bored. I’m still made at myself for only getting to page 100 and then putting it down. Forever.
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by elisa 06/26/2009
I’m so glad you put this on here! Everyone talks about how brilliant this is, but its sheer size alone has made me scared to read it! Congrats on getting to page 100! I’d probably only make it to 25.
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by susie 06/29/2009
I seriously kept pushing myself to continue reading, but then I realized that I had NO idea what was going on and I was just wasting time. So I quit!!
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by gillians 07/01/2009
I’ve read the first 50 pages 3 times now. I like it, but geez.
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by poorluckyme 07/01/2009
I don’t mean to be an intellectual snob, but this is one of my all time favorite books. I can’t help it, I love it.
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by susie 07/01/2009
I don’t think you’re an intellectual snob. I totally want to get through this; I just think my attention span is going down the drain. So, you’re saying it’s totally worth it to suck it up and read it?
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by poorluckyme 07/01/2009
YES…as long as you don’t care if you read 1000 pages books that don’t wrap up the ending…but are still so moving and thought provoking that you still think about the themes all the time- 10 years a
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by susie 07/01/2009
Hmm OK. I’m really determined but I LOVE books like that. I feel like I just need to do it. You’ve convinced me!! I’ll report back… In several years. JK I will read it soon!
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by elisa 07/01/2009
I read some of “Consider the Lobster” (it’s a book of essays by DFW,) a while ago and I liked it— it might be a good way to get your feet wet before tackling “IJ”!
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by susie 07/04/2009
Ooh yeah i’ve been seeing that book at the bookstore for a while now and it looks sooo much easier than Infinite Jest!
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by elisa 07/06/2009
I only read the beginning while I was in a bookstore (it was still in hardback at the time and I couldn’t bring myself to cough up the cash!), but I thought it was pretty good!
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by ghosty 07/20/2009
I’d be interested to know the ratio of people that have actually read this that have it on their shelf. I feel like its a must have for someone hoping to look smart. Not that it isn’t probably great.
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by elisa 07/21/2009
I’d say 75-80%.
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by susie 07/21/2009
I know someone who is obsessed w/ it and talks abt it non-stop. He says I just need to read it to “get” why it’s so great. I don’t think having it on my shelf makes me look smart. Just full of shame :(
Anna Karenina
My book club read this book so I started reading it too. I missed the last meeting and I never finished the book. I only had about 200 pages left.
I just didn’t care about any of the characters and I felt no need to read the end to find out what happened to them. Once she gave up her son for the crazy young guy I was pretty much done with her.
I’m not sure why this is a classic. On a side note: I love this image I didn’t know Scarlett also played Anna.
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by elisa 06/26/2009
I don’t know why, but I think it’s funny when book clubs read classics… Anyway, I had to read this in college, and I managed to read the whole thing, but I’m not sure if I’d be able to read it now!
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by susie 07/01/2009
This is a total book club book!! I want to read this too, but don’t know if I have the energy/patience.
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by elisa 07/01/2009
I remember liking it a lot, but it probably requires some patience if you’re reading it for enjoyment as opposed to reading it for a grade!
"A Wolf at the Table"-- Augusten Burroughs
I liked “Running With Scissors,” and I LOVED “Dry,” but I had a really hard time reading this book. While “Dry” is pretty heavy going (it details Burrough’s struggles with alcoholism), he made it funny and enthralling. However, this book, which is about his abusive father, was just too dark a topic for me.
"On Beauty"-- Zadie Smith
I consider “White Teeth” to be one of my favorite books, so I was really excited when “On Beauty” came out, but for some reason or another, I totally lost interest in this book and stopped reading it after a couple chapters.
"The Corrections"-- Jonathan Franzen
I have tried reading this book MULTIPLE times, but I just can’t get past the first couple pages. And since I have to yet to hear from anyone whether it’s actually worth it, the motivation department is still out to lunch on this one.
Good Reads
A great way to keep track of what you’ve read (or in this case, what you haven’t read).
"Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell"-- Susanna Clarke
This book was hailed as a kind of adult version of “Harry Potter,” and as result I was very intent on reading it, even despite it’s serious heft. And I don’t know if the book gets good after the first 100 pages or so, but I just couldn’t grasp what was going on, and being somewhat of a quitter I just gave up. I know, I’m terrible.
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by poorluckyme 07/01/2009
It took me a full year to read this and it was totally worth it. It’s really really good; please give it another try!
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by shawna 07/01/2009
Wow a year to read a book – I don’t know I could put that much effort into it. Was there a point where you flew through it?
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by poorluckyme 07/01/2009
Yes, I sped through the second half. It takes a while to get who’s who and where they are, but it’s really awesome.
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by elisa 07/01/2009
I’ve heard it’s really awesome— but the beginning was hard to get through. I’m sure I’ll try it again one day— I figure if I can read “Bleak House” I can read this too!
"Love in the Time of Cholera"-- Gabriel Garcia Marquez
I know this supposed to be one of the great books of the 20th century, but I just couldn’t read it! I don’t know what it was, but I just found the whole thing very hard to digest. I feel like SUCH a philistine.
"Life of Pi"-- Yann Martel
Ok, so I know everyone (or lots of people,) absolutely loved this book, but I’m going to have to disagree. Admittedly, I didn’t try to read this under the best reading conditions, but I found the whole thing to be far from enthralling, and needless to say, I didn’t finish the book.
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by shawna 06/24/2009
I didn’t want to read this no matter how many people reccommended it. I read and it was ok but again not great.
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by elisa 06/25/2009
Phew! Now I feel a lot better :)
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by susie 06/26/2009
THIS was not half as good as I thought it was going to be. People hyped it up sooo much. Yeah I thought it was OK but definitely did not go crazy over it. I don’t get why people did.
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by elisa 06/26/2009
Yay! Another person to reconfirm my disdain for Life of Pi!
"The Savage Detectives"-- Roberto Bolano
I heard great things about this book from my friends, and the New York Times loved it, so I was like “I totally gotta read this!” But it sort of reminded me of “Love in the Time of Cholera,” and not surprisingly I couldn’t read this either!
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by matt_fried 07/20/2009
The protagonist just strikes me as a bit whiny and pretentious – which, maybe that’s where the humor is? I don’t know…
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by elisa 07/20/2009
I don’t know what it was, but I read the first 20 pages or so and it was like trying to swim though honey. Perhaps another try is in order?
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by matt_fried 07/20/2009
Perhaps…
The NYT's 10 Best Books of 2008
See what else the NYT loves.
Fortress of Solitude
One word for this book: DENSE. Not exactly the breezy subway read of “Motherless Brooklyn”. Undoubtedly good, but also the kind of book you need a week off from work and no friends to read.
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by elisa 07/23/2009
I thought about reading this a couple times, but every time I read the back cover I decided against it. Have I been missing out??
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by matt_fried 07/23/2009
It’s good, but he’s trying write a modern-day Dickens. So, because there are LOTS of details, it takes forever to get through.
The Satanic Verses
I still plan on finishing this book but the last time I read a page in this book was about 6 months ago. I feel like I have to read it not like I want to read it.
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by elisa 06/23/2009
I feel like I ought to read this because it’s considered to be the best novel of the 20th century (or something like that)— but I feel like I’d have an experience similar to yours!
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by chelsea 07/21/2009
I’ve been meaning to read this for a long time also.
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by shawna 07/23/2009
If you get to it can you just tell me what happens in the end because I have not gotten there yet!
A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man
I know it’s a classic, so I tried soo hard. But I just could not. It has been a longgg while though, so maybe I’ll give it another go. Kind of dreading the thought though.
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by elisa 06/26/2009
You know, I think I might have read this for a class in high school. And since I can’t really remember, I’m guessing that I wasn’t all that impressive!
"Blink"-- Malcolm Gladwell
When this first came out I started to read this in a bookstore and I remember thinking “how fascinating!” But when I picked this up a month or so ago, I just couldn’t get into it.
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by susie 06/26/2009
I LOVED this but i skipped over most of the “war strategy” section. Blah. The Tipping point was better.
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by elisa 06/26/2009
I thought the beginning part about the art was fascinating, and then I just lost interest. I also have The Tipping Point— maybe I should start with that first!
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by susie 06/29/2009
Ooh definitely. If you haven’t read The Tipping Point, do that now! Much more entertaining!
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by elisa 06/30/2009
Good to know!
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by matt_fried 07/20/2009
I used to date this girl who was obsessed with self-help and pop psych. Malcolm Gladwell was her favorite. Since then, I’ve never been able to take this guys seriously.
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by chelsea 07/21/2009
I love all of his books.
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by susie 07/21/2009
It’s totally psych for dumb people. Well not dumb, but common. But still, it’s totally entertaining and gets you thinking, so it can’t be that bad. I enjoy it!
"I Was Told There'd Be Cake"-- Sloane Crosley
I was very excited when I read reviews of this book, and when I saw it was on the “buy one get one half off table” at Borders, I just couldn’t resist. But I was pretty disappointed with this. I was expecting a female David Sedaris, and Crosley just didn’t really deliver.
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by aliciak 06/24/2009
You know what the problem is? She’s not a good writer. There, I said it.
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by elisa 06/24/2009
Haha. I wholeheartedly agree!
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by aliciak 06/25/2009
Before I read this book, I listened to a podcast interview of her on The Sound of Young America and she sounded like a pretty funny chick.
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by susie 06/26/2009
Awww I wanted to read this! But maybe I should stay away.
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by elisa 06/26/2009
It wasn’t bad per se, but it definitely didn’t live up to my expectations.
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by susie 06/29/2009
There’s nothing I hate more than having really high expectations about something and then the book (or movie or whatever) not meeting them!!
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by tashahale 06/30/2009
i tryed reading this. tryed.
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by elisa 06/30/2009
Eh, you didn’t miss out on much!
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by tashahale 06/30/2009
i dont regret it.
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by poorluckyme 07/01/2009
Yes, I tried to read this book and kept getting bored. It’s like a million other memoirs, except not funny or interesting.
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by susie 07/01/2009
Wow, for some reason I thought this was supposed to be totally funny and entertaining. SO glad I didn’t waste my time on it. What would I do without Guidespot??
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by elisa 07/01/2009
I’m glad I’m not the only one! Definitely not terribly interesting or terribly funny— I’d read a David Sedaris story about big turds any day over this.
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by susie 07/04/2009
Love love love David Sedaris!! The sole reason why I get the New Yorker. Well, not really, but part of it!
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by elisa 07/06/2009
I’ve been hoping over last few years that someone will get me a gift subscription to the New Yorker for my birthday— it’s so expensive!
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by susie 07/07/2009
I know! Although I just got an offer for a year of the New Yorker for $40. I think I might need to take advantage of that one!
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by chelsea 07/21/2009
Eh….it was alright….the one with the ponies was cute and that was about it.
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by elisa 07/21/2009
I agree— the pony story was probably the best one. But that made the book totally misleading since that was the first story!
"Atlas Shrugged"-- Ayn Rand
So after I graduated from college, I took a mind-numbing job, and after a while I was convinced I was getting dumber as a result. So, I decided to create a highbrow reading list for myself to keep my brain cells alive and my first book was “Atlas Shrugged.” Perhaps I started off too ambitiously, but needless to say, the highbrow reading list did not last long.
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by shawna 06/23/2009
You should try this again – It is one of my favs
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by elisa 06/23/2009
I know, I should. People really love Ayn Rand, and I want to be one of those people!
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by susie 07/01/2009
I’ve totally avoided reading this too, but my dad told me I really need to. Ehhh. I guess I should?
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by elisa 07/01/2009
It’s intimidating!! Plus, it wasn’t the easiest read in the world. Maybe it’s easier to start with “The Fountainhead”? Anybody have any thoughts?
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by susie 07/01/2009
OK, is that one good? There’s way too much I need to read. Where can I find some more time to do so??
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by elisa 07/01/2009
I haven’t read it so I can’t really say, but it is shorter than AS, and it’s one of my close friend’s favorite books— so I guess it has that going for it!
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by susie 07/07/2009
I read 5 pages of Atlas Shrugged in the bookstore yesterday. Wasn’t horrible but the book was way too small with the smallest print ever. Couldn’t do it.
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by ceembee 07/18/2009
Definitely start with The Fountainhead. It took me a month to get through but I think it was worth it. I’m still struggling with Atlas Shrugged – I think there’s too much going on at the beginning.
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by susie 07/18/2009
OK! I’m taking your advice. Might go on a bookstore trek today and check out The Fountainhead. Whoo hoo! I love this guide!
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by matt_fried 07/20/2009
I just started this…
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by shawna 07/20/2009
I read and enjoyed Atlas Shrugged – I should probably read Fountainhead since everyone is recommending it.
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by ghosty 07/20/2009
The Fountainhead is good, I finished Atlas Shrugged by skimming the huuuge speech. Good stuff, but also a must-read for young Republicans looking to justify their self-centered beliefs. Careful.
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by chelsea 07/21/2009
not a fan. nope.
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by shawna 07/22/2009
@ghosty – I wasn’t going to reveal that I skimmed the long long long and lonnng speech but I did too. The book I borrowed actually had sections underlined so I just read those.
And Now for the Eternal Question...
To Kindle, or not to Kindle…
One Hundred Years of Solitude
I haven’t yet read the other Marquez on here, but I really couldn’t see what the big deal was in regards to this book. Everyone loves it, EVERYONE. I thought it was crap. I also hate magical realism 9 times out of 10, so that’s part of it.
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by elisa 06/24/2009
Yay! More Marquez! We should really start a club.
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by shawna 06/24/2009
I read it, I enjoyed it but I didn’t love it. I think I missed some deep message or something.
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by aliciak 06/25/2009
A book club where we…don’t read the books! Oh I love it!!!!!! Is that irony?
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by elisa 06/26/2009
Haha— probably!
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by karey_ann 06/27/2009
Whaaaaaa?? Marquez on this list twice?? OMG, I need to go have a good cry . . . Alicia, I feel the most apart from you I have since before we first met . . . I’m crushed, really.
Well, this is embarrasing...
Don’t tell anyone, or they’ll strip my English degree. I just couldn’t do it. Maybe I’ll have to try again when I’m all grown up.
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by elisa 06/26/2009
Are you kidding? That’s like one of the hardest books known to man! I was an English major, and I feel no guilt whatsoever about having NO DESIRE to even attempt this book.
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by susie 06/29/2009
I think I’m just not really a James Joyce fan. Though I have to say The Dubliners wasn’t really horrible. I want to like him, but I just cannot do it.
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by elisa 06/30/2009
That’s how I feel about Faulkner. I know I should like him and think he’s a genius, but I just can’t!
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by susie 07/01/2009
Uhh I feel the same way about Faulkner. Snore.
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by susie 07/01/2009
And also, I’m a really horrible English major right now!!
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by elisa 07/01/2009
Yay! When I was in college I felt like an outcast because I hated Faulkner— I actually never told anybody, lest they roll their eyes at me!
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by susie 07/04/2009
Pshh, the way I see it, nobody actually likes him. They just pretend they do to look smart.
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by elisa 07/06/2009
Haha! Susie, I think you’re my new best friend.
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by matt_fried 07/22/2009
As long as you always claim The Dubliners, you’ll be fine anywhere you go.
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by susie 07/23/2009
OK, good to know. Just don’t try to make me read Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man again. ughhhh.
no kidding most boring book ever. We were suppost to read it in high school. When we got to this book, after page 16 my english teacher threw the book down and said “Does anybody have the movie!?” and that was that.
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by elisa 07/09/2009
I can’t believe this. Your English teacher REALLY said that??
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by tashahale 07/10/2009
true story
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by shawna 07/17/2009
Oh come on – this isn’t the best book but it isn’t boring!
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by chelsea 07/21/2009
I LOVE ALL JANE AUSTEN- CAUSE I’M SUPER CHICKY LIKE THAT.
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by susie 07/21/2009
Whaaaat. I LOVE Pride and Prejudice!!! There are sooo many worse things I’ve read in school. I think Jane is fantastic :)
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by tashahale 07/22/2009
i was with the rest of the class i just couldnt get in to it. not says Jane Austen is a bad writer shes just not my style. but i did enjoy the movie.
Democracy in America
As brilliant as the observations are, this book is a book-club killer. If you don’t like the people in your book club and need a way to shoo them off, then recommend this book. I got through about 40 pages and I read more than anyone in our book club (the book club didn’t survive). What I read was interesting in a “wow this guy is really smart” sort of way, but it’s drier than a mouthful of Saltine crackers.
Eat, Pray, Love
You had me until midway through India, Liz.
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by elisa 07/23/2009
Matt Fried, I applaud you for even picking up this book. Never mind making it 1/3 of the way through it!
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by matt_fried 07/23/2009
If you like that, then check this out. http://tinyurl.com/d4d7gv
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by elisa 07/23/2009
I’ve seen the book around, but I had no idea it got optioned for a movie. If it’s half as funny as “The Hangover” I’m game.
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by susie 07/23/2009
No kidding. I don’t know many men who would attempt this. My boyfriend read the man version and I’m sure he’ll be happy to hear about the movie!
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by shawna 07/22/2009 Show 1 Reply
I love love this guide. I think we should also do one on books we love to read! I’m always on the look out for great reads.
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by elisa 07/22/2009
It makes me so happy that everyone likes contributing to this guide—it’s like being part of a book club! I love it.
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