Best and Worst Celebrity Couples

Rihanna and Chris Brown

Nice T-shirt, little Chris Brown. Even as a 12 year old Chris was a open and proud girlfriend pounder.

Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon

Mariah wearing a yarlmulke and a mummy tunic on her wedding day.

So battery I can accept, but kidnapping a minor across state lines… that’s just despicable.

Pete Doherty and Kate Moss

Mutual interests are really important in a relationship. A common affinity for cocaine, excessive alcohol consumption, and reckless behavior make Kate and Pete the worst UK couple in the history of the British Empire.

Brittany and What's His Name Again, I Seriously Forgot...

Matching do-rag styles is just TOXIC behavior.

Amy Winehouse and Blake Fielder Civil

Their a hot cracked out MESS.

Jen and Brad

All was right in the world when Jen and Brad were together.

Marylin Manson and Dita Von Tease

The modern day vampire couple may have been scary, but their sex life was probably bat-shit bananas.

Mariah Carey and Tommy Matola

Tommy was good for Mariah because he helped her keep her pants on in her videos.

Brandy and Kobe Bryant

Weren’t they cute before Kobe was an alleged rapist and Brandy killed innocent people while recklessly driving?

Adrianne Curry and Christopher Knight

Reality TV is doing great things for burnt out, has-been, unworking celebs, for both their careers and their love lives. Good work VHI!

Paris Hilton and Nick Carter

It’s also really important that there’s balance in a relationship. Paris and Nick were equally horrible in all facets of their shameless existance. Seriously, they were actually a good fit.

Sarah Silverman and Jimmy Kimmel

Though recently split Sarah and Jimmy were the funniest couple to ever bump uglies.

Mandy Moore and Ryan Adams

I know a lot of people think they’re an odd couple, but they’re 2 of my favorite people in the world and I’m soo happy they’re engaged! Plus, they do totally cute things together like the above. And I’m sure they make beautiful music together!

Trista and Ryan

Ugh. The Bachelorette’s First Couple love publicity and seem a bit TOO happy.

Rashida Jones and John Krasinski

OMG. Cutest couple in all of the land. They’re not together anymore, right? Man, they should be. I heart them.