You did what in my bed?!

Eating my food. That’s a big pet peeve of mine. I work hard for my money. I don’t make enough to feed myself, you, your brother, sister, pet snake and sea monkeys. That nicely wrapped sandwich in there? Yeah, that’s my lunch. I didn’t go out of my way to decorate a meal for you. Paws off.

My bed is my bed. So if I don’t come home for a night, it’s not okay to let your friend stay in it. In fact, it’d be best that you just stay out of my room. I know we’re all snoopers deep down, but trust me, there’s nothing exciting in those drawers or under that mattress.

Going to the Bathroom WIth the Door Open

This is supposed to be about things we did that pissed off others, right?

She liked to walk around naked ALL THE TIME.

Even in innappropriate situations, like when I had boys over….which if that isn’t a MAJOR knock to yourself esteem to see them oggling at your perfect blonde roomie, I don’t know what is.

No. If it’s too loud, turn it the eff down. I’m one of those 24-year-olds who feels more like 70. I’m asleep by 11 and up by 5. The last thing I want to wake up to is a phone conversation or Britney Spears’ latest song.

There’s nothing worse than stepping into the shower and seeing a pile of what is clearly your roommate’s hair clogging the drain, giving you that nice vomity feel in the morning. Or how about coming home to a sink that’s been full of dishes for days on end. All in all, roommates who fail to clean up after themselves are NOT COOL.

Bathtub Smoker

Um, OK, so admittedly in college, our house was not fit to EVER have our parents over. BUT one of our roommates used to smoke in the bath.

That’s right, we’re talking chain smoking in the bathtub.

What was insane was that she would put her cigarettes out in a cup in the corner AND FREQUENTLY FORGET TO CLEAN IT UP. NOT JOKING.

After a night of (probably) drinking, I would wrench myself out of bed to get ready for class and step into a shower that smelled like the bar I was in the night before.

OMFG so gross. I would not go back to college for anything.

Heating Happy

I used to hate when my roommates turned on the heating super high. It wasn’t the idea of a high heating bill that pissed me off (although, giving half my pay check to the gas company is not something I like to make a habit of), it was more the feeling of being suffocated in my own home that made me annoyed.

Sprayed me with Lysol

I had the flu over one harrowing Thanksgiving and spent five or six days in bed with a raging fever. My roommate, upon returning, sprayed the entire place, including me (I was sleeping on the futon) with Lysol.