Category: Local & Entertainment

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10 Reasons to Stay Out of Pasadena

By GillianS
updated 3 months ago

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Even if you don't live in the L.A. Metro Area, you probably feel like you have some idea of what Pasadena is like - from Beach Boy's songs or parades that you watch on TV (because you are either 80 or 5 years old) or what have you. It's true, this city nestled in the foothills of the San Gabriel Mountains is idyllic, peaceful and clean. Still, I thought of at least 10 reasons why you should never go North on the 110 past the 101. Exit! Exit!!

The Rose Parade

The Rose Parade – which draws nearly a million people to Pasadena every year – is nothing but a huge pain in the ass if you ask me. If you actually wait in the sub 50 degree temperatures all night (hey, that’s cold to us Angelenos!) for good seats along the route, it is a literal pain in the ass, too. However, this video of the Trojan Marching Band soothes me a little bit. Fight On!

The Rose Bowl (the stadium)

The Bruins play here. Do you need another reason to hate it?

This is a Map of Things that Suck...Avoid Them

A – D: Suck City

The Cheesecake Factory

2 W Colorado Blvd, Pasadena, CA 91105

Why is there always a wait for this place? Seriously, could someone please explain it to me?
To be fair, I do really like getting those light up, vibrating coaster thingys while you wait for your table. When they go off, it’s like Christmas!

Why is there always a wait for this place? Seriously, could someone please explain it to me?
To be fair, I do really like getting those light up, vibrating coaster thingys while you wait for your table. When they go off, it’s like Christmas!

See Menu

Pasadena Police Department

207 N GARFIELD AVE PASADENA, CA 91101

Hey, don’t take this one the wrong way, I love cops. What with keeping me safe and making sure my brake lights are working and all of that. However. The Pasadena police give out jaywalking tickets like the dentist gives out toothbrushes. Come on. Jaywalking? Really?

Lucky Baldwin's

17 S Raymond Ave, Pasadena, CA 91105

This hip English pub with a huge selections of beers on tap and in the bottle would e great – if it didn’t reek of vomit as soon sa your crossed the threshold. I don’t want to be gross, but it makes me gag. I heard a rumor that they just never finished the flooring so the vomit smell soaked into the floorboards. I don’t know why it is, but that stench is enough to make me want to stay far away from the whole damn city.

This hip English pub with a huge selections of beers on tap and in the bottle would e great – if it didn’t reek of vomit as soon sa your crossed the threshold. I don’t want to be gross, but it makes me gag. I heard a rumor that they just never finished the flooring so the vomit smell soaked into the floorboards. I don’t know why it is, but that stench is enough to make me want to stay far away from the whole damn city.

 

California Institute of Technology

Pasadena, CA 91101

I have a soft spot for nerds but go within 100 yards of this campus and you’ll think you’re back in high school when none of the guys knew how to talk to girls or hold their liquor. Wait until they’re execs at Microsoft to get your hooks into these guys (and girls)...there are still some edges to be smoothed out.

I have a soft spot for nerds but go within 100 yards of this campus and you’ll think you’re back in high school when none of the guys knew how to talk to girls or hold their liquor. Wait until they’re execs at Microsoft to get your hooks into these guys (and girls)...there are still some edges to be smoothed out.

Club Menage

Even though Club Menage’s MySpace page lists her age as 101, in actuality this Colorado Blvd. dance club hasn’t been there more than 2 years. And yet, it manages to offend me every time I walk by. Not just because of its logo that sandwiches an Austin Powers-style male symbol between two female symbols, but because there is nothing sexy at all about this place. They keep the velvet rope stocked with hot girls to attract more cover-paying customers (read: dudes!) while they let the sausage party inside. Then once you get in, it’s just guys and the girls who weren’t pretty enough to wait in line! My bet is that no one has ever set up an actual threesome at this place. Unless it’s the gross kind with 2 guys…

Parking!

The city of Pasadena has so many parking rules that it needs FOUR web pages to explain them to you. They should just give you a parking ticket at the city limits.

Colorado Street Bridge

Colorado Street Bridge, Pasadena, California

Isn’t this bridge beautiful? That must be why so many people want it to be the last bridge they see as they launch themselves off it. Morbid, but true.

Celebrity Rehab

This titillating trainwreck of a reality show was filmed at the Pasadena Recovery Center. The show’s over, so the odds are probably against running into a strung out Chyna Doll, but still, is that a chance you really want to take? Come to think of it, since she’s not locked up/under contract anymore it might be more likely that you’ll run into her. Yikes.

Some People Never Listen

There are probably a few more things to add to this list – chain store, tourists, the weather (though it doesn’t get quite as hot as the SFV) – but if these 10 reasons aren’t enough to keep you away from this Stepfordesque tourist trap of overpriced furniture and overbearing conservative social mores, then I suspect no amount of listing is going to do any good.  Just don’t come crying to me with that $35 parking ticket.

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